Lately I've been wondering if it's better for all of us if I cut back and spend as little as possible, or continue spending as usual, or do what I can of next year's Christmas shopping now in order to spur the woeful economy. So far my own income has held steady in these trying times, so it's not a matter of having to decide between food and prescriptions, the situation that many are encountering.
Of course my decision is quite small-scale, but if everyone who could made an extra purchase or two now, it seems to me the economy would be quite stimulated.
So far,though, I've instinctively been cutting back. Most everyone seems to be doing the same thing, whether from need or caution. Not sure that's the best approach. Certainly it's not the boldest approach.
What do you think?
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Monday, February 09, 2009
Sunday, February 08, 2009
A Sip of Bold Action
Today's little spark of inspiration comes from a milk carton. This morning as I took the chocolate Silk soymilk out of the fridge, I noted the advice on the side: "Take A Sip Forward," a sentence that, by the way, is trademarked.
The idea is that drinking soy milk is "one small step toward living at your best." The carton also told me to laugh, eat chocolate, and get exercise. But what struck me is the idea of progress measured in sips.
I've heard it said to people wanting to lose weight that "everything you put in your mouth counts."
The reverse of that is that each small good thing that any of us do, in any area of life,counts. Small actions that are creative, generous, courageous, add up and ripple outward.
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The idea is that drinking soy milk is "one small step toward living at your best." The carton also told me to laugh, eat chocolate, and get exercise. But what struck me is the idea of progress measured in sips.
I've heard it said to people wanting to lose weight that "everything you put in your mouth counts."
The reverse of that is that each small good thing that any of us do, in any area of life,counts. Small actions that are creative, generous, courageous, add up and ripple outward.
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Saturday, February 07, 2009
Persistence and a Technological Triumph
Allow me to crow. After two and three quarters hours of fiddling, husband Bob and I have succeeded in getting wireless to work at our house on my laptop. We've never even been able to use a cellphone here. We're in the woods and apparently hard for signal to find.
This miraculous computing capability was accomplished with a little AT&T gizmo that installed its own software. So far the process is dreadfully slow, but still it allows me to tap out a few lines, just short of midnight, by standing at an upstairs window with the machine held up in the air to the spot that gets enough signal. May sound clumsy, but just remember the Wright Brothers' first flights were pretty clunky too. Maybe tomorrow I'll be on the roof with this thing, or up a tree. At any rate, I'm thrilled with tonight's progress.
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This miraculous computing capability was accomplished with a little AT&T gizmo that installed its own software. So far the process is dreadfully slow, but still it allows me to tap out a few lines, just short of midnight, by standing at an upstairs window with the machine held up in the air to the spot that gets enough signal. May sound clumsy, but just remember the Wright Brothers' first flights were pretty clunky too. Maybe tomorrow I'll be on the roof with this thing, or up a tree. At any rate, I'm thrilled with tonight's progress.
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Friday, February 06, 2009
Start A Business
When I was a kid, my mother used to drop pieces of advice on me as they happened to occur to her. One day, she said, somewhat out-of-the-blue: Never buy a business; you'll come out much better if you start your own.
I did do exactly that, when I was twenty-two and started freelancing full-time. Now, decades later I've discovered a series of books aimed at people wanting to start various highly specific businesses.
I stumbled onto Entrepreneur Magazine's Startup Series when I saw their book on blogging: Start Your Own Blogging Business, which is quite good, very thorough and detailed. The previous publications page showed 36 other books,
Start Your Own Bar and Tavern
Start Your Own Import/Export Business
Start Your Own Medical Claims Billing Service
or Car Wash, or Gift Basket Service, or Growing and Selling Herbs and Herbal Products, and so on.
If you're thinking about starting a business, do check the Startup Series to see if your specialty is included. I felt a spark of interest in starting something just from looking at the list.
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I did do exactly that, when I was twenty-two and started freelancing full-time. Now, decades later I've discovered a series of books aimed at people wanting to start various highly specific businesses.
I stumbled onto Entrepreneur Magazine's Startup Series when I saw their book on blogging: Start Your Own Blogging Business, which is quite good, very thorough and detailed. The previous publications page showed 36 other books,
Start Your Own Bar and Tavern
Start Your Own Import/Export Business
Start Your Own Medical Claims Billing Service
or Car Wash, or Gift Basket Service, or Growing and Selling Herbs and Herbal Products, and so on.
If you're thinking about starting a business, do check the Startup Series to see if your specialty is included. I felt a spark of interest in starting something just from looking at the list.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Thursday, February 05, 2009
Boldly on Hold
Seems to me that though there's a lot of scrambling going on in these difficult economic days, in some sense the country is on hold. Lots of decisions, actions, expenditures have been delayed. (Yesterday a writer told me about her novel, which was close to sold in October. A well-known editor at a major house loved it, needed only a committee's expected approval, said it could take as much as a week. The writer is still waiting. Her agent says it's going to happen but not soon because, "Things are a mess here.")
This brought to mind a question: how does one best handle being on hold? A lot of that depends on money of course: whether, primarily, to focus on writing another novel or on finding a job bagging groceries. However, there's a psychological part of the response that is also important. It's a question of keeping on with what's important anyway.
Once in my early pre-email years of freelancing, I had a few days when I didn't have enough money to buy stamps. I just kept writing the letters, so I'd have them ready to send, when I got hold of the stamps. It was only letters, and it was only a few days, so no big deal. But now, we face something like that situation nationwide, and I think it's important that we keep on with our important work, even while on hold.
And maybe there are ways that being boldly on hold can offer something new and useful to the process. I also remember a screenwriter talking about how upbeat and productive she was during a writer's strike of many months. She had a sense of freedom, because she knew the phone wasn't going to ring, knew already that she wasn't going to sell anything today; and so she worried less and felt free to concentrate on her work.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
This brought to mind a question: how does one best handle being on hold? A lot of that depends on money of course: whether, primarily, to focus on writing another novel or on finding a job bagging groceries. However, there's a psychological part of the response that is also important. It's a question of keeping on with what's important anyway.
Once in my early pre-email years of freelancing, I had a few days when I didn't have enough money to buy stamps. I just kept writing the letters, so I'd have them ready to send, when I got hold of the stamps. It was only letters, and it was only a few days, so no big deal. But now, we face something like that situation nationwide, and I think it's important that we keep on with our important work, even while on hold.
And maybe there are ways that being boldly on hold can offer something new and useful to the process. I also remember a screenwriter talking about how upbeat and productive she was during a writer's strike of many months. She had a sense of freedom, because she knew the phone wasn't going to ring, knew already that she wasn't going to sell anything today; and so she worried less and felt free to concentrate on her work.
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Wednesday, February 04, 2009
ORGANIZING FOR THE CREATIVE PERSON
My friend Sabine was helping a mutual friend overhaul the inside of her house. They'd been hard at it all morning and then met me for lunch (I, who had merely been sitting at a computer.) Their dust-stirring industry was inspiring to hear about.
Sabine had learned a lot of her techniques, she said, from Organizing for the Creative Person: Right-Brain Styles for Conquering Clutter, Mastering Time, and Reaching Your Goals by Dorothy Lehmkuhl and Dolores Cotter Lamping.
My first reaction: what a persuasive title. It begins by flattering the reader: I may be a heap, but I'm an imaginative one. The flattery sticks because there's truth to it, for most anyone who would pick it up. (Aside: another book that did that welcome-to-the-book gesture well was first published in Europe with the title Prisoners of Childhood. It went on to succeed in this country under the title Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self. What a difference a few words can make.)
Anyway, back to my point. I've found some good stuff here:
*you don't have to get rid of a particular objet, just find a place for it
*a pile of papers is a pile of unmade decisions (get BOLD and make those decisions)
*if you're intensely engaged in doing something you value, you're an instant success (this can be helpful for writers who ask themselves: will it sell? will it be good? am I wasting my time?)
*little bits of regular effort add up; regularly set a timer for 15 minutes and spend that long on one troublesome problem
And I haven't even finished reading it; my husband got hold of it, which is just fine with me. If we both did a bit of straightening, there's no telling what treasures we might find. (I found five lost items just yesterday: earring, purple jacket, camel pin, checkbook, and a notebook.) More on camel pin another day.
Happy organizing, you bold and creative person. Do feel free to report results here.
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Sabine had learned a lot of her techniques, she said, from Organizing for the Creative Person: Right-Brain Styles for Conquering Clutter, Mastering Time, and Reaching Your Goals by Dorothy Lehmkuhl and Dolores Cotter Lamping.
My first reaction: what a persuasive title. It begins by flattering the reader: I may be a heap, but I'm an imaginative one. The flattery sticks because there's truth to it, for most anyone who would pick it up. (Aside: another book that did that welcome-to-the-book gesture well was first published in Europe with the title Prisoners of Childhood. It went on to succeed in this country under the title Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self. What a difference a few words can make.)
Anyway, back to my point. I've found some good stuff here:
*you don't have to get rid of a particular objet, just find a place for it
*a pile of papers is a pile of unmade decisions (get BOLD and make those decisions)
*if you're intensely engaged in doing something you value, you're an instant success (this can be helpful for writers who ask themselves: will it sell? will it be good? am I wasting my time?)
*little bits of regular effort add up; regularly set a timer for 15 minutes and spend that long on one troublesome problem
And I haven't even finished reading it; my husband got hold of it, which is just fine with me. If we both did a bit of straightening, there's no telling what treasures we might find. (I found five lost items just yesterday: earring, purple jacket, camel pin, checkbook, and a notebook.) More on camel pin another day.
Happy organizing, you bold and creative person. Do feel free to report results here.
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Tuesday, February 03, 2009
Chasing Updike
My one meeting, some years ago, with my hero John Updike involved a very small bit of boldness, which turned out well in its modest way. It took place not long after my first novel Revelation had come out. I wrote about the incident at the time for a Research Triangle newspaper. I'm "the local novelist" of the story. Here it is, in memory of an extraordinary writer who died last week:
Author Mobbed, Politely
The afternoon book signing had been underway for twenty-five minutes, and the line was now stretched, more than two hundred strong, from the deep recesses of Duke's Gothic Bookshop across the wide traffic area inside the Bryan Student Center.
Seated in the back of the store was the focus of this throng, John Updike, signing copies of his books.
As the line moved slowly into the store, a local novelist, proud author of one published book, arrived to take her place in the waiting crowd. Ten minutes passed before the line appeared to move at all.
People waited quietly, many of them reading. The line inched forward as Updike fans continued to arrive, some with big sacks of his books. The local novelist carried in her stack a copy of her own book to give to her longtime hero. She and Updike were inextricably linked, she knew: Her own writing had been compared with his in many of her book's reviews.
An hour passed. People began to check their watches more often. The glass doors of the store were still several feet away.
A store official came out and warned: He probably won't get to you. More than one hundred remained, politely refusing to hear any such thing.
The local novelist did make it through the doors. Updike was in clear view now, his famous beak of a nose and his great pile of silver hair. Then, as those nearest watched, Updike stood up and left, vanished out the back door.
The local novelist turned to find that behind her was an equally disappointed local poet who had brought a volume of his own to offer as a gift.
The crowd broke for dinner, then reassembled later in front of Page Auditorium, to wait an hour to get good seats for the reading.
Updike read and talked to a crowded house. He was witty, hyperintelligent, genuine--everything that the assembled body had come to hear. Then he finished and left the stage. Again the chance to meet him had passed--until one student raced up onto the stage and back into the wings and was quickly followed by dozens more.
Good-humoredly, Updike started signing books again. Again the line moved slowly. Finally the local novelist stood before the long-awaited Updike--just as a student official interrupted, saying, "I'm sorry. We have to clear the stage."
The local novelist, about to miss out the second time, was suddenly wild-eyed. She shoved her book at the surprised Updike with both hands. "Here," she said. "This is a present. I wrote this."
Updike stared for a moment and blinked. "Follow me," he said.
"Keep your place in line," he called out to the whole crowd, "and follow me."
Single file then, Pied Piper-style, he led several dozen people in a circuitous route, out through the wings, down the flight of steps, out of the auditorium, across a stretch of campus, back into the student center. The line followed him faithfully as he searched for a place to sit.
Then the line waited again. Updike signed more books. He accepted the book, finally, from the local novelist, who forgot to mention their intertwined fates. He accepted the volume of verse from the poet. At 10 p.m. the crowd dispersed for the last time, six hours after it had begun to form. Fans of a different sort might have rioted. But for these New Yorker-reading groupies, gathered to honor a novelist of marriage, manners, and morals, a ruckus like that never would have done.
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Author Mobbed, Politely
The afternoon book signing had been underway for twenty-five minutes, and the line was now stretched, more than two hundred strong, from the deep recesses of Duke's Gothic Bookshop across the wide traffic area inside the Bryan Student Center.
Seated in the back of the store was the focus of this throng, John Updike, signing copies of his books.
As the line moved slowly into the store, a local novelist, proud author of one published book, arrived to take her place in the waiting crowd. Ten minutes passed before the line appeared to move at all.
People waited quietly, many of them reading. The line inched forward as Updike fans continued to arrive, some with big sacks of his books. The local novelist carried in her stack a copy of her own book to give to her longtime hero. She and Updike were inextricably linked, she knew: Her own writing had been compared with his in many of her book's reviews.
An hour passed. People began to check their watches more often. The glass doors of the store were still several feet away.
A store official came out and warned: He probably won't get to you. More than one hundred remained, politely refusing to hear any such thing.
The local novelist did make it through the doors. Updike was in clear view now, his famous beak of a nose and his great pile of silver hair. Then, as those nearest watched, Updike stood up and left, vanished out the back door.
The local novelist turned to find that behind her was an equally disappointed local poet who had brought a volume of his own to offer as a gift.
The crowd broke for dinner, then reassembled later in front of Page Auditorium, to wait an hour to get good seats for the reading.
Updike read and talked to a crowded house. He was witty, hyperintelligent, genuine--everything that the assembled body had come to hear. Then he finished and left the stage. Again the chance to meet him had passed--until one student raced up onto the stage and back into the wings and was quickly followed by dozens more.
Good-humoredly, Updike started signing books again. Again the line moved slowly. Finally the local novelist stood before the long-awaited Updike--just as a student official interrupted, saying, "I'm sorry. We have to clear the stage."
The local novelist, about to miss out the second time, was suddenly wild-eyed. She shoved her book at the surprised Updike with both hands. "Here," she said. "This is a present. I wrote this."
Updike stared for a moment and blinked. "Follow me," he said.
"Keep your place in line," he called out to the whole crowd, "and follow me."
Single file then, Pied Piper-style, he led several dozen people in a circuitous route, out through the wings, down the flight of steps, out of the auditorium, across a stretch of campus, back into the student center. The line followed him faithfully as he searched for a place to sit.
Then the line waited again. Updike signed more books. He accepted the book, finally, from the local novelist, who forgot to mention their intertwined fates. He accepted the volume of verse from the poet. At 10 p.m. the crowd dispersed for the last time, six hours after it had begun to form. Fans of a different sort might have rioted. But for these New Yorker-reading groupies, gathered to honor a novelist of marriage, manners, and morals, a ruckus like that never would have done.
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Monday, February 02, 2009
Self-Doubt in the Great
Recently, in discussing the writer's self-doubt in the comments with writer Greta, I speculated that even my hero the recently passed John Updike probably had such moments.
In one of the tributes to Updike in The New Yorker since, I found proof of this. In a letter to novelist E.L. Doctorow, Updike wrote that as a young man he was busily unfolding his own stories with techniques learned from others (which, may I say, he utterly transformed.) But, writing one day in his later years, he said: "now I am almost paralyzed by thinking of the great number of contemporary writers who know things I don’t know and can do things I can’t."
Doctorow's comment: "The self doubt of this prodigious talent moved the hell out of me."
But he wasn't paralyzed. He kept writing and publishing. He kept at it, in spite of any wobbles.
(Tomorrow: a piece I wrote years ago about my one encounter with Updike.)
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
In one of the tributes to Updike in The New Yorker since, I found proof of this. In a letter to novelist E.L. Doctorow, Updike wrote that as a young man he was busily unfolding his own stories with techniques learned from others (which, may I say, he utterly transformed.) But, writing one day in his later years, he said: "now I am almost paralyzed by thinking of the great number of contemporary writers who know things I don’t know and can do things I can’t."
Doctorow's comment: "The self doubt of this prodigious talent moved the hell out of me."
But he wasn't paralyzed. He kept writing and publishing. He kept at it, in spite of any wobbles.
(Tomorrow: a piece I wrote years ago about my one encounter with Updike.)
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Sunday, February 01, 2009
Getting Up the Nerve to Be Genuine
I've just come from my friend Laurel's 70th birthday brunch, held by the members of her Thursday afternoon writer's class/group, which I have been a member of for 26 years.
In advance of the day, we put together a small album in which we each had six pages to use as we wish to express our appreciation to her. As I said in this book, these kinds of productions make me nervous. Too much untempered emotion, I suppose. But I got into it. We all did. She was overwhelmed. It was very satisfying for everyone involved.
Regularly and easily expressing emotion of the warm fuzzy kind-- for me that would be truly bold. What takes courage is so different for each of us. I tell myself that when I see someone go bonkers over a spider.
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In advance of the day, we put together a small album in which we each had six pages to use as we wish to express our appreciation to her. As I said in this book, these kinds of productions make me nervous. Too much untempered emotion, I suppose. But I got into it. We all did. She was overwhelmed. It was very satisfying for everyone involved.
Regularly and easily expressing emotion of the warm fuzzy kind-- for me that would be truly bold. What takes courage is so different for each of us. I tell myself that when I see someone go bonkers over a spider.
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Friday, January 30, 2009
The Importance of Sweating the Small Stuff
Response to my Wednesday's post about dealing with a Blue Cross coverage malfunction leads me to impassionedly say more.
The ideas a couple of people expressed -- which I welcome! -- include the view that others are worse off, I shouldn't sweat the small stuff, and that I think about what Gandhi would do .
Yes, there are people horrifically worse off. My difficulty is minor. I agree.
And that is why it's important for me to speak and act. I do a disservice to many if I take the easier route and become one more person who doesn't go to the trouble of protesting when a big company doesn't do right by an individual.
It's only the well-off who can afford to blow off the loss of $200. And only the well-off can afford to say, "This won't do. It has to stop." If I, with my advantages, look the other way (which is so tempting) I will have failed myself. And failed anyone else whom my taking action might have helped.
About Gandhi. I think of him often. He's the guy who said it's each person's responsibility to refuse to cooperate in his own oppression. Noncooperation was his chief alternative to violence. And he dealt with the little injustices (problems with salt) as well as the large. Little things ignored grow large, particularly as they multiply across a population.
My philosophy for myself is: sweat and don't fret. I write instead of fretting. Gandhi's version of that is to do the work full tilt and don't hang your peace of mind on the results. (And of course: breathe!)
I welcome and encourage your further thoughts here on this.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on get="_blank">Digg. Thanks so much.
The ideas a couple of people expressed -- which I welcome! -- include the view that others are worse off, I shouldn't sweat the small stuff, and that I think about what Gandhi would do .
Yes, there are people horrifically worse off. My difficulty is minor. I agree.
And that is why it's important for me to speak and act. I do a disservice to many if I take the easier route and become one more person who doesn't go to the trouble of protesting when a big company doesn't do right by an individual.
It's only the well-off who can afford to blow off the loss of $200. And only the well-off can afford to say, "This won't do. It has to stop." If I, with my advantages, look the other way (which is so tempting) I will have failed myself. And failed anyone else whom my taking action might have helped.
About Gandhi. I think of him often. He's the guy who said it's each person's responsibility to refuse to cooperate in his own oppression. Noncooperation was his chief alternative to violence. And he dealt with the little injustices (problems with salt) as well as the large. Little things ignored grow large, particularly as they multiply across a population.
My philosophy for myself is: sweat and don't fret. I write instead of fretting. Gandhi's version of that is to do the work full tilt and don't hang your peace of mind on the results. (And of course: breathe!)
I welcome and encourage your further thoughts here on this.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on get="_blank">Digg. Thanks so much.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
My Little Health Insurance Hell: Part Two
So after my first efforts failed, I (boldly) talked with a Blue Cross rep by phone who kindly told me the name of a drugstore where I could get a vaccination that would be covered.
The next day I went to the drugstore. They give the anti-shingles shots, but said my insurance wouldn't cover it. I reported that I'd been told to come there specifically. The pharmacy man said Blue Cross is telling people that they can get the shots there, with coverage, but that BC hadn't yet given the store the infrastructure and info needed to do it.
He said people are coming to that store on a daily basis, expecting to get the vaccine with Blue Cross coverage, and then not being able to get that.
So, fuming in my car in the mall parking lot, I (boldly) called Blue Cross again and was told that all the info I'd received on the previous day about the drugstore was incorrect.
Now seethingly considering my next (bold) action.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
The next day I went to the drugstore. They give the anti-shingles shots, but said my insurance wouldn't cover it. I reported that I'd been told to come there specifically. The pharmacy man said Blue Cross is telling people that they can get the shots there, with coverage, but that BC hadn't yet given the store the infrastructure and info needed to do it.
He said people are coming to that store on a daily basis, expecting to get the vaccine with Blue Cross coverage, and then not being able to get that.
So, fuming in my car in the mall parking lot, I (boldly) called Blue Cross again and was told that all the info I'd received on the previous day about the drugstore was incorrect.
Now seethingly considering my next (bold) action.
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Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Problem Solving
Lately I've been feeling indomitable in the matter of solving the kinds of little problems that often I'm tempted to let sit a few days. Like dealing with getting an acknowledgment of purchase for an order I'd just cancelled. Or finding someone to give me a vaccination in the manner that my insurance company requires. All those paperwork-y, this-is-not-what-we-agreed-on, 800-number type things.
And I've rediscovered (for the millionth time) that solving one such problem, even if the outcome isn't ideal, makes the next little project easier.
So I Googled "solving small problems" to see what others had to say. Some results, which I heartily endorse:
"Get control of the office by solving little problems quickly. Don't let little issues now turn into bigger ones later. Tackle them immediately for a sense of control."
"But avoiding them can leave you feeling like you have little control and that just adds to stress. ... Feeling capable of solving little problems builds the inner confidence to move on to life's bigger ones - and it and can serve you well in times of stress."
"Make it a goal to have at least one new idea everyday; this will get you to be more creative. Create your own mathematical or physical problems and try to solve them. Get in the habit of solving little problems all day, for instance finding the quickest way around town...."
Note: I don't need to create any more mathematical or physical problems. I'll bet you also have enough on hand to open up the creative channels and add muscle to your solving ability.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
And I've rediscovered (for the millionth time) that solving one such problem, even if the outcome isn't ideal, makes the next little project easier.
So I Googled "solving small problems" to see what others had to say. Some results, which I heartily endorse:
"Get control of the office by solving little problems quickly. Don't let little issues now turn into bigger ones later. Tackle them immediately for a sense of control."
"But avoiding them can leave you feeling like you have little control and that just adds to stress. ... Feeling capable of solving little problems builds the inner confidence to move on to life's bigger ones - and it and can serve you well in times of stress."
"Make it a goal to have at least one new idea everyday; this will get you to be more creative. Create your own mathematical or physical problems and try to solve them. Get in the habit of solving little problems all day, for instance finding the quickest way around town...."
Note: I don't need to create any more mathematical or physical problems. I'll bet you also have enough on hand to open up the creative channels and add muscle to your solving ability.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Dealing Boldly With Blue Cross
Oboy. Health insurance Catch-22,000.
Here's what I emailed to my friend Angela Friday when this happened:
"I ordered the $200 serum for the shingles vaccine after checking to see that it was covered. When I went to get it to take to my doc, the pharm. said they hadn't covered it because it had to be ordered by the doctor from the serum company not by prescription to be picked up by the patient.
So I left it at the drugstore and went to my doc's and they called BCBS and said our patients always get it at the drugstore. (According to the nurse,) BC said, well, that's changed now.
My doc's office continues to work on it.
So irksome. Driving around Cary all afternoon for nought. My mother had her shingles shot scheduled and woke up with shingles on the morning she was to get the shot. Bob pointed out to me that at least I wasn't dealing with insurance at the same time I was terribly sick. (Like Obama's mother. He has talked a lot about her spending her last months upset about insurance.)
Thank you for allowing me to vent."
Update: So this morning my doc called and said she doesn't order serum through her office. She did kindly offer to administer the shot at no charge, once I get the serum.
I have to pay the drugstore, because after having been told by BC that my policy covered it, I agreed to. (I'm not going to claim that my own policy toward paying bills has changed to not paying them, or now includes a disclaimer that says I don't have to if I don't want to.)
And now to discover my appeals possibilities, with BC BS and the Department of Insurance person.
I don't like this. And it's not right. Am all over it. (Meaning "in action," not "recovered.") Will keep you posted.
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Here's what I emailed to my friend Angela Friday when this happened:
"I ordered the $200 serum for the shingles vaccine after checking to see that it was covered. When I went to get it to take to my doc, the pharm. said they hadn't covered it because it had to be ordered by the doctor from the serum company not by prescription to be picked up by the patient.
So I left it at the drugstore and went to my doc's and they called BCBS and said our patients always get it at the drugstore. (According to the nurse,) BC said, well, that's changed now.
My doc's office continues to work on it.
So irksome. Driving around Cary all afternoon for nought. My mother had her shingles shot scheduled and woke up with shingles on the morning she was to get the shot. Bob pointed out to me that at least I wasn't dealing with insurance at the same time I was terribly sick. (Like Obama's mother. He has talked a lot about her spending her last months upset about insurance.)
Thank you for allowing me to vent."
Update: So this morning my doc called and said she doesn't order serum through her office. She did kindly offer to administer the shot at no charge, once I get the serum.
I have to pay the drugstore, because after having been told by BC that my policy covered it, I agreed to. (I'm not going to claim that my own policy toward paying bills has changed to not paying them, or now includes a disclaimer that says I don't have to if I don't want to.)
And now to discover my appeals possibilities, with BC BS and the Department of Insurance person.
I don't like this. And it's not right. Am all over it. (Meaning "in action," not "recovered.") Will keep you posted.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
The Courage to Face the Times' Crossword Puzzle
Major bold move of this weekend so far: I bought a new crossword puzzle book, having done all I could with the last one. The ones I currently go for are the New York Times easy-to-hard collections. I once threw away an unfinished one that was all Sunday Times crosswords. (Times puzzles are easiest on Monday and get harder all week.)
Perhaps you are thinking that this doesn't seem like a bold move. But being a not-so-serious cruciverbalist can be humbling. It's like getting an achievement test score every day, when you took the test on not enough sleep.
I've been dabbling at it on and off for years and I've gotten somewhat better at it--can pretty well whip through Monday through Wednesday. And I remember the time when Monday was a test. Recently I read about a fellow who won't do the Mon-Wed puzzles because they're simply too easy for him to be engaging. I fancy myself fairly clever and well-read and up on cultural references (weak on rivers and athletes) but I may never get to that league.
Still,last night I sharpened my pencil once again. And there's little that's so delicious as a good pencil and a clean puzzle.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Perhaps you are thinking that this doesn't seem like a bold move. But being a not-so-serious cruciverbalist can be humbling. It's like getting an achievement test score every day, when you took the test on not enough sleep.
I've been dabbling at it on and off for years and I've gotten somewhat better at it--can pretty well whip through Monday through Wednesday. And I remember the time when Monday was a test. Recently I read about a fellow who won't do the Mon-Wed puzzles because they're simply too easy for him to be engaging. I fancy myself fairly clever and well-read and up on cultural references (weak on rivers and athletes) but I may never get to that league.
Still,last night I sharpened my pencil once again. And there's little that's so delicious as a good pencil and a clean puzzle.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Between Semesters
Looks like I'm finished with a large writing project. There may be a few more details, but probably not much more than that.
I like the weightless feeling that getting something done gives me. On the other hand, this was extremely interesting: revising a book on a topic that fascinates me. I'll miss it.
But I haven't arrived at that mood yet: still in the weightless period, making calls I'd put off making, spending a little more time on my novel, doing smaller critiques, not rushing back from lunch, and feeling pleasantly open to surprises.
My horoscope today on Daily Om : "Feelings of boldness and a sense of self-assurance are your likely companions as you walk through life today." Yes, indeed!
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
I like the weightless feeling that getting something done gives me. On the other hand, this was extremely interesting: revising a book on a topic that fascinates me. I'll miss it.
But I haven't arrived at that mood yet: still in the weightless period, making calls I'd put off making, spending a little more time on my novel, doing smaller critiques, not rushing back from lunch, and feeling pleasantly open to surprises.
My horoscope today on Daily Om : "Feelings of boldness and a sense of self-assurance are your likely companions as you walk through life today." Yes, indeed!
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Bold Even in the Details
I was so happy with yesterday's inauguration, in large ways and small. I do feel that we begin fresh again, perhaps as we have never done before.
Here in central North Carolina, we woke up to see new fresh deep snow, as we've not seen here in quite a long while. Everything looked pristine.
And then I saw (on TV) the hundreds of thousands of flags waving on the Mall, and Obama himself, and the line-up of former presidents and defeated contenders gathered to witness the "peaceful transfer of power" and I felt a confidence in us that I haven't felt in a while.
I was also thrilled by one little detail. At the moment of word bumbling in the oath: Obama didn't get flustered! He didn't let a small problem lead to a bigger one. He was graceful and the awkward moment passed.
Hooray for a leader who can smoothly handle an awkward moment in front of a high percentage of the people in the planet -- and who also thinks straight and means well. This is the best combo I can imagine.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Here in central North Carolina, we woke up to see new fresh deep snow, as we've not seen here in quite a long while. Everything looked pristine.
And then I saw (on TV) the hundreds of thousands of flags waving on the Mall, and Obama himself, and the line-up of former presidents and defeated contenders gathered to witness the "peaceful transfer of power" and I felt a confidence in us that I haven't felt in a while.
I was also thrilled by one little detail. At the moment of word bumbling in the oath: Obama didn't get flustered! He didn't let a small problem lead to a bigger one. He was graceful and the awkward moment passed.
Hooray for a leader who can smoothly handle an awkward moment in front of a high percentage of the people in the planet -- and who also thinks straight and means well. This is the best combo I can imagine.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Monday, January 19, 2009
V.S. Naipaul and M.L. King
Here it is MLK Day and I'm not at the march just down the street; instead I'm obsessed with V.S. Naipaul.
Now, Martin Luther King is one of the people I admire most in all of human history. Never has boldness been put to better use than in the creation of the nonviolent civil rights movement.
But this past week I've been obsessively reading The World Is What It Is, the biography of Nobel laureate writer Naipaul by Patrick French. Never have I been more engrossed in a book.
First, Naipaul is the author of one of my two favorite books, Enigma of Arrival, and I'm a devoted admirer of almost all of his work. I agree with the assessment of many that Naipaul is the best living writer of English, and an extremely perceptive observer of the world. From what I've read, I also agree with the assessment of many that he has been a world-class jerk to quite a number of people.
In my view, these two outstanding facets of the man neither excuse nor diminish each other. His work "is what it is," no matter what he has done otherwise. At the same time, the fact that his books are extraordinary, that he exerts a brilliant charm, does not make it okay to mistreat people, to act in a manner that has often seemed mean and petty and prejudiced and fiercely elitist. (When I described some of the incidents to Husband Bob, he summed up his response in an off-the-cuff couplet: "Don't mess/With V.S.")
But, as so many have been, I'm fascinated by the combo. Some would call it bold to be as unapologetically self-centered as his authorized biography shows him. I don't see it that way.
But his work is bold; it fits no categories, which is an enormous risk for a writer who wants to be published. His language and insight are of such quality that he got past that obstacle.
By contrast, Martin Luther King's view of people was bold. He wanted--and brought closer--justice and opportunity for "all of God's children."
(If Naipaul, a Trinidadian Indian, making his way alone and poor in London had not faced so much prejudice himself, he might have emerged more accepting.)
Both people have achieved something extraordinary and enduring. Neither was/is a perfect individual.(King appears to have been a less than ideal husband.) Tremendous achievement doesn't take away the less admirable aspects of a person. But when I'm feeling less than admirable, I find the example of landmark-achievement-by-flawed-human a good one to keep in mind.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Now, Martin Luther King is one of the people I admire most in all of human history. Never has boldness been put to better use than in the creation of the nonviolent civil rights movement.
But this past week I've been obsessively reading The World Is What It Is, the biography of Nobel laureate writer Naipaul by Patrick French. Never have I been more engrossed in a book.
First, Naipaul is the author of one of my two favorite books, Enigma of Arrival, and I'm a devoted admirer of almost all of his work. I agree with the assessment of many that Naipaul is the best living writer of English, and an extremely perceptive observer of the world. From what I've read, I also agree with the assessment of many that he has been a world-class jerk to quite a number of people.
In my view, these two outstanding facets of the man neither excuse nor diminish each other. His work "is what it is," no matter what he has done otherwise. At the same time, the fact that his books are extraordinary, that he exerts a brilliant charm, does not make it okay to mistreat people, to act in a manner that has often seemed mean and petty and prejudiced and fiercely elitist. (When I described some of the incidents to Husband Bob, he summed up his response in an off-the-cuff couplet: "Don't mess/With V.S.")
But, as so many have been, I'm fascinated by the combo. Some would call it bold to be as unapologetically self-centered as his authorized biography shows him. I don't see it that way.
But his work is bold; it fits no categories, which is an enormous risk for a writer who wants to be published. His language and insight are of such quality that he got past that obstacle.
By contrast, Martin Luther King's view of people was bold. He wanted--and brought closer--justice and opportunity for "all of God's children."
(If Naipaul, a Trinidadian Indian, making his way alone and poor in London had not faced so much prejudice himself, he might have emerged more accepting.)
Both people have achieved something extraordinary and enduring. Neither was/is a perfect individual.(King appears to have been a less than ideal husband.) Tremendous achievement doesn't take away the less admirable aspects of a person. But when I'm feeling less than admirable, I find the example of landmark-achievement-by-flawed-human a good one to keep in mind.
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
New Year's Resolution Update
Okay, it's only two weeks into the year, but anything after the first week can be a wobbly moment.
My resolution I summed up at the time as To Defuse the Resistance. And my plan of action was to meditate twice a day, ten minutes each. (explanation on earlier post.)
In short, meditation is to help me to get past the obstacles to where I want to be, on all fronts.
So far, I've been doing the meditating. That's big. And I actually got around to buying a kitchen timer last night. (I'd been peeking at the clock up til now.)
And I attribute to the meditating (and getting great feedback) the fact that I've had one significant breakthrough in revising my novel. I'm very happy about that.
On the other hand, I'm still deep into the sugar habit, Mickey D's Sweet Iced Tea and the birthday cakes in my freezer that I'm still methodically polishing off.
If I had to choose, I'd rather things go well with the novel, but the fact is, I could choose to well on both.
How's it going with any resolves or goals of yours?
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
My resolution I summed up at the time as To Defuse the Resistance. And my plan of action was to meditate twice a day, ten minutes each. (explanation on earlier post.)
In short, meditation is to help me to get past the obstacles to where I want to be, on all fronts.
So far, I've been doing the meditating. That's big. And I actually got around to buying a kitchen timer last night. (I'd been peeking at the clock up til now.)
And I attribute to the meditating (and getting great feedback) the fact that I've had one significant breakthrough in revising my novel. I'm very happy about that.
On the other hand, I'm still deep into the sugar habit, Mickey D's Sweet Iced Tea and the birthday cakes in my freezer that I'm still methodically polishing off.
If I had to choose, I'd rather things go well with the novel, but the fact is, I could choose to well on both.
How's it going with any resolves or goals of yours?
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Bold Relationships
I have a box of quotes on my desk: the draw-one-a-day kind of collection. Today's card: "Courage opens the heart." I googled the sentence and found the source: Rob Kall, who has apparently given such matters a lot of thought.
Another of his I found particularly interesting is in the form of a question: "How much pleasure can you tolerate before you can't take it anymore?" The conventional wisdom is that we stick with what feels good, but it's not always true. The phrase "too rich for my blood" is often used to describe such situations. Maybe it's fear that comes from having something that we constantly fear losing.
I can remember romances in my single days that inspired that feeling; that it would be easier to be out of it than to feel that it might end any minute. Paradoxical, but that kind of thinking can really be tenacious.
I'm very happily (and intensely) married for 25 years now; it was several years into the marriage before I completely relaxed. Husband Bob kept saying, "Just take me for granted." He finally convinced me, or I finally believed him. I also feel that if he took off now, I'd already have had a bounteous share of happy marriage.
I think fully enjoying something is the antidote to the fear of it all ending, which, for some of us, takes practice.
(A psychologist friend Bryce Kaye has a chapter online from his book The Marital First Aid Kit on what he calls "hedonic inhibition" in relationships, about the inner stuff that gets in the way of having a whole lot of fun.)
(And thanks, Mamie, who is the source of the quote box, and author of the blog Can I Do It?)
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Another of his I found particularly interesting is in the form of a question: "How much pleasure can you tolerate before you can't take it anymore?" The conventional wisdom is that we stick with what feels good, but it's not always true. The phrase "too rich for my blood" is often used to describe such situations. Maybe it's fear that comes from having something that we constantly fear losing.
I can remember romances in my single days that inspired that feeling; that it would be easier to be out of it than to feel that it might end any minute. Paradoxical, but that kind of thinking can really be tenacious.
I'm very happily (and intensely) married for 25 years now; it was several years into the marriage before I completely relaxed. Husband Bob kept saying, "Just take me for granted." He finally convinced me, or I finally believed him. I also feel that if he took off now, I'd already have had a bounteous share of happy marriage.
I think fully enjoying something is the antidote to the fear of it all ending, which, for some of us, takes practice.
(A psychologist friend Bryce Kaye has a chapter online from his book The Marital First Aid Kit on what he calls "hedonic inhibition" in relationships, about the inner stuff that gets in the way of having a whole lot of fun.)
(And thanks, Mamie, who is the source of the quote box, and author of the blog Can I Do It?)
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Ideal Self
It would be a bold undertaking indeed, to be one's ideal self for even an hour, much less regularly. The idea keeps coming up in my mind. When I want a behavior change, rewards usually work pretty well. But most rewards that interest me are not ideal, often involving too much sugar or cash. Ideally, being one's best would be its own reward. I've yet to have that work, maybe I haven't held out long enough.
I could start by figuring out exactly what this individual would look like. I know she would be less self-involved and more altruistic. I also know that I'm much more interested in getting into Barbie doll physical condition, which is not likely to happen, and a waste of time to attempt. (But doing it wouldn't rule out altruism; it's not either/or.) Obviously, my first bold step would be for my operating systems to get a clear idea of what my Real Best would be. Or maybe this is just procrastination, and I should go straight to work at a soup kitchen this minute, without much more than a glance in a mirror, or any further nattering over self-improvement.
Do you feel you're living at your potential much or most of the time? What does that mean? How'd you get there?
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
I could start by figuring out exactly what this individual would look like. I know she would be less self-involved and more altruistic. I also know that I'm much more interested in getting into Barbie doll physical condition, which is not likely to happen, and a waste of time to attempt. (But doing it wouldn't rule out altruism; it's not either/or.) Obviously, my first bold step would be for my operating systems to get a clear idea of what my Real Best would be. Or maybe this is just procrastination, and I should go straight to work at a soup kitchen this minute, without much more than a glance in a mirror, or any further nattering over self-improvement.
Do you feel you're living at your potential much or most of the time? What does that mean? How'd you get there?
If you like this post, please bookmark it on del.icio.us, share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg. Thanks so much.
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