It would be a bold undertaking indeed, to be one's ideal self for even an hour, much less regularly. The idea keeps coming up in my mind. When I want a behavior change, rewards usually work pretty well. But most rewards that interest me are not ideal, often involving too much sugar or cash. Ideally, being one's best would be its own reward. I've yet to have that work, maybe I haven't held out long enough.
I could start by figuring out exactly what this individual would look like. I know she would be less self-involved and more altruistic. I also know that I'm much more interested in getting into Barbie doll physical condition, which is not likely to happen, and a waste of time to attempt. (But doing it wouldn't rule out altruism; it's not either/or.) Obviously, my first bold step would be for my operating systems to get a clear idea of what my Real Best would be. Or maybe this is just procrastination, and I should go straight to work at a soup kitchen this minute, without much more than a glance in a mirror, or any further nattering over self-improvement.
Do you feel you're living at your potential much or most of the time? What does that mean? How'd you get there?
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Thursday, January 15, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Answering E-Mail -- All of It
Just caught up on e-mail completely. Even the ones that were harder to answer, or took time. (There's one pending that requires a piece of info I don't have yet, but that doesn't count.)
I consider this quite bold. Sometimes I'll open and close one a few times before answering it: not bold.
It feels invigorating to do these little things in an unhesitating way. And it's hard to remember that as the little things pile up.
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I consider this quite bold. Sometimes I'll open and close one a few times before answering it: not bold.
It feels invigorating to do these little things in an unhesitating way. And it's hard to remember that as the little things pile up.
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Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Jury Duty!
We showed up at 9 a.m. at the courthouse, half a courtroom full of varied individuals. The man sitting beside me, Sean, was an art director maybe in his late 30s.
In front of me were two black women who seemed to know each other. A lot of men in shirtsleeves, not a single tie. One 65ish woman in a tres svelte suit and a killer good haircut. A tired-looking blonde girl within days of having a baby. A very tall lanky young fellow with a Dutch name several rows ahead. (I know his name because he was one of the nine mildly stunned when their names were drawn, not for the trial of the day, but for a year-long appointment to the Grand Jury which meets once a month.)
At about 11 a.m. we were dismissed for three hours for the court to do preliminary business. I worked on my novel--minor changes on hard copy in pen--first at the hip, granola-ish General Store Cafe (caramel apple cake and decaf) and then when the Council on Aging started pouring in for their lunch meeting, at Hardee's (medium-sized sweet iced tea, if you must know; could have done worse.)
At 2 p.m., we all returned and filled the pews again. All of us on time, nobody skipping town. The judge Narley Cashwell, who'd done an impressive job of being clear in his explanations without being condescending, then dismissed us. The defendant, charged with assaulting a policeman, possession of drugs, etc., had decided at lunch to plead guilty. The jury pool erupted in applause at the news.
While it was an interesting little adventure in, for me, a different town than usual, none of us really longed to be there, it seemed. We were all taking time away from something else.
My point: we have a bold system of government that relies on people showing up, I do know there'd be trouble for anyone who didn't, but trouble is not always a deterrent. Our system really does rely on any and every person. I know it makes mistakes, but still... It made me kinda proud to see it again, genuinely democratic, in action.
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In front of me were two black women who seemed to know each other. A lot of men in shirtsleeves, not a single tie. One 65ish woman in a tres svelte suit and a killer good haircut. A tired-looking blonde girl within days of having a baby. A very tall lanky young fellow with a Dutch name several rows ahead. (I know his name because he was one of the nine mildly stunned when their names were drawn, not for the trial of the day, but for a year-long appointment to the Grand Jury which meets once a month.)
At about 11 a.m. we were dismissed for three hours for the court to do preliminary business. I worked on my novel--minor changes on hard copy in pen--first at the hip, granola-ish General Store Cafe (caramel apple cake and decaf) and then when the Council on Aging started pouring in for their lunch meeting, at Hardee's (medium-sized sweet iced tea, if you must know; could have done worse.)
At 2 p.m., we all returned and filled the pews again. All of us on time, nobody skipping town. The judge Narley Cashwell, who'd done an impressive job of being clear in his explanations without being condescending, then dismissed us. The defendant, charged with assaulting a policeman, possession of drugs, etc., had decided at lunch to plead guilty. The jury pool erupted in applause at the news.
While it was an interesting little adventure in, for me, a different town than usual, none of us really longed to be there, it seemed. We were all taking time away from something else.
My point: we have a bold system of government that relies on people showing up, I do know there'd be trouble for anyone who didn't, but trouble is not always a deterrent. Our system really does rely on any and every person. I know it makes mistakes, but still... It made me kinda proud to see it again, genuinely democratic, in action.
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Monday, January 12, 2009
A Second New Year's or First Day of School
I'm in organizational tying up loose-ends mode today. In a way that I wasn't when the year actually ended. Just finished the major part of a very large project, and have a moment to clear off both my desktops (virtual and physical) and create a little order. It's very satisfying. And I always resolve to keep another pile from forming, or at least keep it from getting this high. But then it happens again, and after a while I take care of all the little items again. That seems to be the natural order. There's a business organization guru I've read, David "Getting Things Done" Allen, who describes the process as ever starting over. That's its nature. It relaxes me to think of it that way, rather than in a once-and-for-all way, followed by oops-I-let-this-pile-up-happen-again.
And tomorrow I have jury duty.
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And tomorrow I have jury duty.
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Sunday, January 11, 2009
Which Would Be the Bold, Brave, Right Decision?
I'm hooked on sweet fast-food iced tea. One large one a day.
It used to be two, and I successfully cut back to one.
The reason for this moderation is that caffeine is for me a bit of a depressant and an anxiety builder.
My remaining one large cup can still muddy my skies a bit. And I keep drinking it anyway.
The obvious wise choice would be to drink only a small one or quit altogether. But a lot of the time I'd rather drink the tall one and risk the 2 or 3 hours of being a little more jumpy and overcast.
That's a lot of time to maybe not be at my best. And I don't seem to care enough to do anything about it. So, Ideal Self, what are you going to do about it???
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It used to be two, and I successfully cut back to one.
The reason for this moderation is that caffeine is for me a bit of a depressant and an anxiety builder.
My remaining one large cup can still muddy my skies a bit. And I keep drinking it anyway.
The obvious wise choice would be to drink only a small one or quit altogether. But a lot of the time I'd rather drink the tall one and risk the 2 or 3 hours of being a little more jumpy and overcast.
That's a lot of time to maybe not be at my best. And I don't seem to care enough to do anything about it. So, Ideal Self, what are you going to do about it???
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Saturday, January 10, 2009
Bold Recovery
My husband Bob would like everyone to know that he was very sensitive and thoughtful in his celebration of my recent birthday. This is to counter the few lines of iffy publicity he received here after his BOLD choice of a 25th anniversary present was not well received. (This happens sometimes with bold choices.)
Anyway, he has celebrated my 60th over several days, culminating last night, after I thought the celebration over, with the one-woman little inflatable kayak I'd been longing for. I am thrilled! I'm keeping the big photo on the box in front of me until it's warm enough to launch comfortably. Yay, Bob! Here I come, Jordan Lake!
Bob demonstrated great gift-boldness-gone-awry behavior. Terrific recovery!
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Anyway, he has celebrated my 60th over several days, culminating last night, after I thought the celebration over, with the one-woman little inflatable kayak I'd been longing for. I am thrilled! I'm keeping the big photo on the box in front of me until it's warm enough to launch comfortably. Yay, Bob! Here I come, Jordan Lake!
Bob demonstrated great gift-boldness-gone-awry behavior. Terrific recovery!
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Friday, January 09, 2009
A Demonstration of Cheekiness (Boldness)
Do go visit the lovely and wildly flattering piece written about me and Sister India on Mojo's blog.
Here's why (other than because it's so nice about me): There's a five minute clip from a Bollywood movie that shows Varanasi, the holy city where my novel Sister India is set. It's a beautiful trip along the Ganges and the riverbank temples and old maharajah's palaces-- with just the right Hindi music. I'll likely visit the site there regularly, when I need to read an encouraging word and when I want to be taken back to India.
Posting this link was bold, don't you think?
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Here's why (other than because it's so nice about me): There's a five minute clip from a Bollywood movie that shows Varanasi, the holy city where my novel Sister India is set. It's a beautiful trip along the Ganges and the riverbank temples and old maharajah's palaces-- with just the right Hindi music. I'll likely visit the site there regularly, when I need to read an encouraging word and when I want to be taken back to India.
Posting this link was bold, don't you think?
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Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Achieving Sixty!!
At last: the actual day. As of 2:34 p.m. today, I have lived for sixty action-packed years. And more to go.
When my husband Bob turned sixty, my mother said: "You tell him I've had 20 good years since that age SO FAR." Now she's up to 26.
I'm thinking the same way. My big commemoration will be in October, when (for business purposes) I'm spending a month in New York. Getting a sublet. Being briefly "a New York writer."
I'm also celebrating today and all week. Note Self-portrait with Birthday Card.
I've never liked the term crone. Wise woman isn't much better. Crones and wise women don't read gossip blogs, moisturize, or wear cool shoes.
However, I do see the potential for sixty being pretty cheeky.
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High Flying
Yesterday's post was about the gumption of a lawyer-turned-jewelry-designer.
Here are a couple of William Spear enamels from my own permanent collection. Looking at them, I saw a distinct theme emerging: SOARING. Especially when I consider that my next acquisition will be the High Diver pin (blurrily photographed from the catalog.)
Soaring seems the right thing -- since tomorrow I turn sixty.
If it seems the right thing for you too, you might get/make yourself some kind of visual reminder.
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Tuesday, January 06, 2009
"The World's Most Wonderful Enamels" from the "King O' Pins"
Bill Spear got his law degree in Nebraska and moved to Alaska to become an assistant Attorney General.
But then he threw it all over to follow a passion sparked in him when he was four years old and saw some bright enamel pins from a military school.
He'd always liked to draw isolated objects. So, first as a hobby, then as a business: he started making drawings of objects and turning them into bright charming intricate enamel pins.
He has created over 2,000 designs. They include images you might never expect to see as a piece of jewelry: a DNA helix, a bellhop carrying suitcases, a diver in mid-air, a geisha, a crawling baby, bagpipes, or one of many different species of fish and birds and other sea creatures.
Husband Bob and I went to his shop in Juneau when we were there a few years ago. First we noticed that people all over this surprisingly small town were wearing collections of pins, all at once. Both men and women.
We tracked the pins down to their showcases at William Spear Design, and were delighted with these wee bits of wearable art, mostly hand-made. Each one is so particular that it seems like a fragment of a story. I have one of a Prairie-style house, and a dinosaur, and a book with wings, and a tube of artist's paint. I have my eye on the high diver in the red bathing suit.
They're irresistible. (And they range from about $5 to $20 each.) I'm so glad Bill Spear didn't resist the urge to create them. And thanks to the article in Coastal Living magazine for info on his history.
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But then he threw it all over to follow a passion sparked in him when he was four years old and saw some bright enamel pins from a military school.
He'd always liked to draw isolated objects. So, first as a hobby, then as a business: he started making drawings of objects and turning them into bright charming intricate enamel pins.
He has created over 2,000 designs. They include images you might never expect to see as a piece of jewelry: a DNA helix, a bellhop carrying suitcases, a diver in mid-air, a geisha, a crawling baby, bagpipes, or one of many different species of fish and birds and other sea creatures.
Husband Bob and I went to his shop in Juneau when we were there a few years ago. First we noticed that people all over this surprisingly small town were wearing collections of pins, all at once. Both men and women.
We tracked the pins down to their showcases at William Spear Design, and were delighted with these wee bits of wearable art, mostly hand-made. Each one is so particular that it seems like a fragment of a story. I have one of a Prairie-style house, and a dinosaur, and a book with wings, and a tube of artist's paint. I have my eye on the high diver in the red bathing suit.
They're irresistible. (And they range from about $5 to $20 each.) I'm so glad Bill Spear didn't resist the urge to create them. And thanks to the article in Coastal Living magazine for info on his history.
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Monday, January 05, 2009
Encouragement to Speak Up
"...When I meet visionary teachers who feel isolated on their own campus and ask them what they have done to make their vision known, the answer is often nothing -- which is why they are isolated. The lost will never be found until they send up a flare." from The Courage to Teach by Parker J. Palmer
My added thought: The visionary will only be a daydreamer if she doesn't make her vision accessible to others.
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My added thought: The visionary will only be a daydreamer if she doesn't make her vision accessible to others.
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Friday, January 02, 2009
Another Good Courage Quote
From Mamie, the source of many good quotes (and photos):
Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day, saying...I will try again tomorrow.
- Unknown
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Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day, saying...I will try again tomorrow.
- Unknown
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Hacked! And Inspired!
Someone sent 2,096 of my friends and colleagues an email Friday trying to sell electronics devices. If the message made it past your spam filter, sorry for the intrusion.
I discovered this state of affairs tonight--didn't pay much attention to my email over the weekend.
But I stayed unusually cool...all on account of an inspiring manuscript I'm reading. A young writer to whom I provided only the slightest bit of help sent me her completed novel asking if I'd consider writing a blurb for her brand-new agent to send out with the manuscript.
First, it was exciting to see what she'd done. Then I spent most of the day reading it: and the book so inspired me. The story put me in the mood to relish the minor difficulties of life as part of the big game.
I'm not always inclined to take that attitude. The last time I played a driveway game of pickup basketball, some decades ago, I got irritated because people kept waving their hands in my face.
Today's delightful reading reminded me that the waving hands and other obstructions are part of what makes the game.
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I discovered this state of affairs tonight--didn't pay much attention to my email over the weekend.
But I stayed unusually cool...all on account of an inspiring manuscript I'm reading. A young writer to whom I provided only the slightest bit of help sent me her completed novel asking if I'd consider writing a blurb for her brand-new agent to send out with the manuscript.
First, it was exciting to see what she'd done. Then I spent most of the day reading it: and the book so inspired me. The story put me in the mood to relish the minor difficulties of life as part of the big game.
I'm not always inclined to take that attitude. The last time I played a driveway game of pickup basketball, some decades ago, I got irritated because people kept waving their hands in my face.
Today's delightful reading reminded me that the waving hands and other obstructions are part of what makes the game.
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Monday, December 29, 2008
The Boldness Pledge
This is an invitation. At this auspicious time of year, what would you like to promise yourself to boldly and resolutely do? I invite you to make that decision public here in the comments some time before the end of Friday. And I will do the same.
The more specific the goal, the better. Example: to get the whole house organized vs. to spend a minimum of two hours a week cleaning out closets and shelves, until they're in the desired condition. See how a specific might get more done?
What's important about going public? The person who does this is more likely to accomplish the goal. Also, she or he gains allies and resources that way. Things fall into place better when all the world and planets can see how they might help out.
I hope you'll post here your own bold pledge to yourself.
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The more specific the goal, the better. Example: to get the whole house organized vs. to spend a minimum of two hours a week cleaning out closets and shelves, until they're in the desired condition. See how a specific might get more done?
What's important about going public? The person who does this is more likely to accomplish the goal. Also, she or he gains allies and resources that way. Things fall into place better when all the world and planets can see how they might help out.
I hope you'll post here your own bold pledge to yourself.
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Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Have Fun!
Merry Christmas! Happy Hannukah! Happy New Year!
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Tuesday, December 23, 2008
The War of Art
I just started listening in my car to an audio version of the book The War of Art (a clever spin on Sun Tzu's classic Art of War) So far I've only heard the first disc, and I've listened to it twice!! though I just got it yesterday!!
Such good stuff. This is the second great resource I've come upon in recent weeks, the other being The Courage to Teach.
The War of Art is (so far)about resistance-- resisting sitting down to write, or standing up to paint, and more. The author Steven Pressfield views all reluctance to do the best right thing as resistance, a force like gravity that we simply need to acknowledge and persevere in spite of. The way I'm saying it sounds dreadfully pious and unappealing. But hearing it on this audio really has me excited.
The metaphor of one large thing that mindlessly sits on my efforts to get off of the sofa works startlingly well for me. I always knew something was there, Jello-like, trying to stop me. I didn't connect it with the same force that says: I'll check my email instead of working on my novel.
Pressfield says the resistance tends to strike when we approach getting down to work on art, a spiritual practice, any health improvement, or strengthening abdominal muscles.
He says --and, oh, I agree -- that the big R can take a wickedly beguiling variety of forms including lawyerly logic. And whatever form it is: "resistance always lies...is always full of shit."
(Thanks to Thomas Griggs for letting me know about this book/CD.)
BTW, Pressfield writes bestsellers, frequently about warfare (also The Legend of Bagger Vance) I'd say, in his case, resistance doesn't stand a chance.
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Such good stuff. This is the second great resource I've come upon in recent weeks, the other being The Courage to Teach.
The War of Art is (so far)about resistance-- resisting sitting down to write, or standing up to paint, and more. The author Steven Pressfield views all reluctance to do the best right thing as resistance, a force like gravity that we simply need to acknowledge and persevere in spite of. The way I'm saying it sounds dreadfully pious and unappealing. But hearing it on this audio really has me excited.
The metaphor of one large thing that mindlessly sits on my efforts to get off of the sofa works startlingly well for me. I always knew something was there, Jello-like, trying to stop me. I didn't connect it with the same force that says: I'll check my email instead of working on my novel.
Pressfield says the resistance tends to strike when we approach getting down to work on art, a spiritual practice, any health improvement, or strengthening abdominal muscles.
He says --and, oh, I agree -- that the big R can take a wickedly beguiling variety of forms including lawyerly logic. And whatever form it is: "resistance always lies...is always full of shit."
(Thanks to Thomas Griggs for letting me know about this book/CD.)
BTW, Pressfield writes bestsellers, frequently about warfare (also The Legend of Bagger Vance) I'd say, in his case, resistance doesn't stand a chance.
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Monday, December 22, 2008
One Maybe-Stupid Way to Write with Ease
Though I've had a lot to say here about holiday prep, the fact is I've done what prep I've done in about 12 minutes and otherwise have been working like a coal miner on client projects, mainly one very large one.
Saturday I took the first full day off from any writing/editing for quite a while. Sunday I had a little trouble getting cranked up again. And I realized that I'd forgotten what the initial crank-up felt like: a bit of resistance, easily overcome, but still I felt it....Once again a demonstration that touching "the work" every day, if only for a few minutes, can solve one kind of problem (though, I admit, it may cause others. For one thing,it's the 22nd of December, and I don't seem to have gotten all my Christmas cards out.)
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Saturday I took the first full day off from any writing/editing for quite a while. Sunday I had a little trouble getting cranked up again. And I realized that I'd forgotten what the initial crank-up felt like: a bit of resistance, easily overcome, but still I felt it....Once again a demonstration that touching "the work" every day, if only for a few minutes, can solve one kind of problem (though, I admit, it may cause others. For one thing,it's the 22nd of December, and I don't seem to have gotten all my Christmas cards out.)
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Friday, December 19, 2008
Hit the Ball, You-All
Mamie, who contributed yesterday's Goethe quote, has found us another bit of get-up-and-go inspiration:
"Be bold. If you're going to make an error, make a doozey, and don't be afraid to hit the ball."
Billie Jean King
As matter of fact, Goethe said something similar: "A clever man commits no minor blunders." (from Brainyquote.com)
It's the "sin boldly" principle, an idea that has always stuck in my head. It has a refreshing clarity.
And "hit the ball?" Well, that brings back my days as head junior varsity cheerleader at Wilmington, NC's New Hanover High School, the home of the Wildcats. One of our ever-useful cheers was: "Hit the ball, you-all! Hit the ball!" Clap. Clap. Clap. Which is pretty much what Billie Jean King, Goethe, Mamie, and I are saying.
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"Be bold. If you're going to make an error, make a doozey, and don't be afraid to hit the ball."
Billie Jean King
As matter of fact, Goethe said something similar: "A clever man commits no minor blunders." (from Brainyquote.com)
It's the "sin boldly" principle, an idea that has always stuck in my head. It has a refreshing clarity.
And "hit the ball?" Well, that brings back my days as head junior varsity cheerleader at Wilmington, NC's New Hanover High School, the home of the Wildcats. One of our ever-useful cheers was: "Hit the ball, you-all! Hit the ball!" Clap. Clap. Clap. Which is pretty much what Billie Jean King, Goethe, Mamie, and I are saying.
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Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Nervous Goethe?
Mamie, a most-welcome regular bold participant here, has sent us a quote: "Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it."
- Goethe
I've read this before, but as I told her, am always glad to be reminded. I also had the thought: Wonder if Goethe was actually a nervous procrastinator.
It's universally known that we all teach (or rattle on about) what we personally need to learn.
I'll bet Goethe was trying to convince himself. I'm going to check around and find out. Thoughts of any Goethe-ists on this would be most welcome.
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- Goethe
I've read this before, but as I told her, am always glad to be reminded. I also had the thought: Wonder if Goethe was actually a nervous procrastinator.
It's universally known that we all teach (or rattle on about) what we personally need to learn.
I'll bet Goethe was trying to convince himself. I'm going to check around and find out. Thoughts of any Goethe-ists on this would be most welcome.
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Be the Gift
I once heard a woman say in the flurry of "doing" Christmas that she'd decided one afternoon to "be the gift." Often a phrase like this means giving a gift of time: changing someone's lightbulbs or hanging out with them or some such.
But this woman was thinking of it differently. And she was on her way to the mall at the time. So she proceeded to be especially nice to every clerk or cashier she met, every shopper she bumped against. The whole experience was lighter, easier; and she had a wonderful time. Don't you love that? I thought it quite bold.
Another way of thinking about this approach, which I ran across in a sermon: "A Quaker friend of mine used to say to me, 'I will hold you in the light.'”
Of course the whole busy business also applies to Hannukah celebrations and others at this time of year. I've also seen the experience referred to as "doing December." Whatever the occasion, "being the gift" can work.
I watch people like my office partner who celebrates both Christmas and Hannukah (interfaith marriage) and once did a symbolic candle-lighting ceremony on the fold-down tray table on a flight to France (where they were to spend a year) with her family including brand-new baby. Now that's multi-tasking. Or multi-enjoying. She's one who is good at being the gift.
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But this woman was thinking of it differently. And she was on her way to the mall at the time. So she proceeded to be especially nice to every clerk or cashier she met, every shopper she bumped against. The whole experience was lighter, easier; and she had a wonderful time. Don't you love that? I thought it quite bold.
Another way of thinking about this approach, which I ran across in a sermon: "A Quaker friend of mine used to say to me, 'I will hold you in the light.'”
Of course the whole busy business also applies to Hannukah celebrations and others at this time of year. I've also seen the experience referred to as "doing December." Whatever the occasion, "being the gift" can work.
I watch people like my office partner who celebrates both Christmas and Hannukah (interfaith marriage) and once did a symbolic candle-lighting ceremony on the fold-down tray table on a flight to France (where they were to spend a year) with her family including brand-new baby. Now that's multi-tasking. Or multi-enjoying. She's one who is good at being the gift.
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