Don't Give Up!

A heartening tale: a friend whose agent has been circulating her first novel to editors for three years and three months just got a two-book deal.

Here's to discovering one's calling in life and keeping on! I find that such occurrences encourage me, not just at work but in every part of the day.

Here's to that loyal agent as well.

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Spunkiness in the Book Business

It takes some bold individuals to start an independent bookstore of any sort at this time in history. All Booked Up not only opened this past May, but after only four months in business, they moved down the street to a larger location. The place sells gently used and antiquarian books and collectibles. It has the feel of a Victorian house and is located in the turn-of-the-previous-century historic district of the little downtown.

Congratulations to booksellers Janice Monaco & Shiloh Burnam, and thanks for creating this delightful spot.

BTW, I'll be giving a wee talk there this coming Monday night at 7:30, focusing on my novel Sister India. Fly in if you can.

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Another Self-Actualizing, Pump-Up Technique

A variation on yesterday's idea: for moments when you need encouragement, keep a file in your desk drawer of nice notes or reviews or even a letter from your mother that reminds you that you're dazzling and your work is important and worthwhile.

--This idea came from psychologist husband Bob.

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A Self-Actualizing, Pump-Up Technique

What I've discovered from writing the fellowship application I was blogging about yesterday:

Affirmations work. Or they can at least stoke the passions and build confidence.

You know what I mean by affirmations, yes? The empowering sayings we're encouraged to repeat to ourselves, such as: I am a calm and capable person. I am a person who doesn't even like sugar and caffeine.

I've never much been into repeating those items. I meditate and I blog and I exercise and do my work and that's all the discipline and structure I can stand.

Plus a screenwriter pal of mine once had an affirmations false alarm. She told me that repeating her declarations were giving her an amazing feeling of peace. But then the screenwriters' strike ended and she discovered that the peace was coming not from affirmations but instead from not listening for the phone. She quickly returned to amazing frazzlement.

However, I've spent the afternoon carefully wording my Career Narrative, which is every good thing I've done professionally in my life, and that amounts to a two-page affirmation. I have succeeded in dazzling myself. I am now so full of beans that it's just a shame it's the end of the day and time to quit and go home. (When I woke this morning, I was distinctly not-so-dazzled by me.

But now I know how a quick pump-up is done. Seriously. If I want to take charge, beat procrastination, make a step toward bold living, I could write down some good things I've actually done. These, I'm happy to say, do not include steering clear of sugar and caffeine.

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Following Bliss Upstream

Two recent bits of bold living that I'm proud to claim:

1. Took the whole Labor Day weekend off and caught up on reading and sleep (in order of importance.)

2. Am now at work on my application for a Guggenheim fellowship, which is a very prestigious and sought-after plum. I just ran across a not-so-encouraging item saying that as of 2006 only two people in the history of NC State University have received one of these. Oh, dear.

I didn't need to know this figure; I was already going to produce the best application I could. So I am now putting that potentially daunting info aside. I'm watching that miserable factoid slide out of sight.

Now back to boldly writing my Career Narrative.

Consistently keeping on is a crucial component in following any calling in life. It's more difficult, I think, than daring.

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Decisive Action--With an Attitude

It appears that some alien has messed with my email addresses...causing a variety of confusions and miscommunications.

Decisive action was called for: new email address.

I spent the day semi-successfully working at viewing the complications as a "challenge" and an "opportunity." Mentally tiring. But do-able, both the fix and the positive mindset.

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September Energy and Fresh Resolve

All grownups need the fresh start of the first day of the school year. Kids have this, of course. And my academic pals do, too.

For me, time seems weirdly seamless. Gardening season eases into kayak season which cools back into gardening. And work is the same year-round: except that in August a lot of people are hard to get hold of.

New Beginning

Now August is over, and yesterday and today here are suddenly crisply September-the-way-it's-supposed-to-be. Makes me want to start fresh, buy a ring binder and a Sheaffer cartridge pen and some Blue Horse notebook paper (the basics of my long-ago school days.)

I did clean out some files yesterday (only because my computer was "in the shop") and it was almost as good as new school supplies.

Because of the change in weather, September--not January--feels the proper time for new resolve. Got any new goals or resolutions for this semester? I plan to have my nailed down by Labor Day.

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Making Changes and Experimenting

This blog is spiffing up a bit. As with human make-overs, the change is not happening in an instant. Instead, with much help, I'm sorta playing with it. Trying this and that, learning a tiny bit about the inner workings. I never thought I'd be interested in such a thing, but it keeps calling me back.

So, expect a few days of shifting elements and pictures and such. And count on the same jolly philosophy of creative freedom and daily courage.

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Making Changes and Experimenting

This blog is spiffing up a bit. As with human make-overs, the change is not happening in an instant. Instead, with much help, I'm sorta playing with it. Trying this and that, learning a tiny bit about the inner workings. I never thought I'd be interested in such a thing, but it keeps calling me back.

So, expect a few days of shifting elements and pictures and such. And count on the same jolly philosophy of creative freedom and daily courage.

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Boldly Overcoming Fear of Code (Scroll Down to See More)

Why this blog looks peculiar today: Last night I decided that I'd go into the inner workings, fiddle with the html code and make a few changes.

I'd never touched any code in my life before. Amazingly, I was somewhat successful. I made the changes I wanted.

Plus, obviously, a few that I could do without. Sorry for any inconvenience. I will get this straight eventually. Sooner, I hope.

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Fairy Encounters and the Courage to See and Speak

About yesterday's class in Remedial Fairy Viewing: for those who are open to the possibility, it was a class in ordinary practical techniques for attempting something nearly unbelievable.

For anyone who isn't open to the idea(and you probably did not attend), instructor Megan Mitchell still offered some wisdom. It was a talk about "the expansion of the possible" and learning to pay extraordinary attention.

Techniques for Better Fairy Viewing

Lesson 1: Become aware of which of your senses is dominant and expect the most revealing information (about anything) to come through that window. Mitchell doesn't see fairies; if she closes her eyes, she doesn't even visualize the room she's in. So if she hasn't taken in what the chairs and floor look like, how could she see something subtle and evanescent? Instead, she hears--and gets translations in her dreams.

Lesson 2: The better vocabulary you develop for the fleeting things you observe, the more detailed your experience will be. We do tend to deny the existence of things that don't fit; as in, "I didn't really see that" or "I made that up" or "That could not have happened."

Lesson 3: Recall the imaginary friend of your childhood--or create one--and tell that friend what you want to see.

Lesson 4: Before going to sleep, ask your dreams to answer a specific question you have about a plant or bush or tree. Expect the answer to be cloaked in surprising symbolism.

Also:
*"Natural intelligences want to communicate with you."
*Leave food offerings in private garden spots. Butter is "wildly popular" with the nature spirit world.

The Courage to Say What You See

Now, about the matter of speaking up: I once wrote a novel (Revelation) about a minister who hears God speaking out loud in English in his back yard in Chapel Hill. Does he rush to tell his congregation? No. He's embarrassed; he doesn't believe in this sort of thing. Plus, people will think he's crazy.

One member of the audience yesterday disclosed that years ago he had started seeing elfin creatures and he was put in a hospital for a couple of weeks. He decided that he would not see them any more, because it was too frightening.

Total disclosure:

*I once saw a floating orb of light above a woman's head. About the size of a pearl onion and just as real as anything else in the room.
*I once felt a hawthorn tree sending me a warm current of communication, about six or eight inches wide. It went into my chest, looped around, came out and headed back toward the tree.
*I once felt sharp puffs of air against my cheek with no discernible explanation.

That's my whole catalog. I wish it were larger. As a self-employed novelist, I really don't risk anything by saying things that some might consider loony.

I'm working on expanding my sense of the possible, so I can take in whatever is now out of my reach. Probably it would help if I ever managed to talk in person about these things without a hint of an eyeroll or sardonic tone.

Seen/felt/heard anything extraordinary lately?

I've found lots of stories of seeing fairies online. Hearing about someone else's experience is one way any of us can expand our ideas of what's possible.

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Courageous Admission

Bold act for today: mentioning here that I'm on my way to a class in Remedial Fairy Viewing. More later.

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Fear, Daring, Working Blind

Being a magazine junkie, I was flipping through an old issue of American Libraries this morning, and a folded poster slid out, large enough to cover all the cartoons and taped items on a professor's door.

It said: "Do I Dare Disturb the Universe?" This quote from T.S. Eliot's "Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" was writ large in celebration of last April as National Poetry Month.

Wisdom had actually fallen into my lap. And a dare: to say what I feel I'm here to say, and then "let the chips fall...."

Any writer or artist,innovator of any sort, risks making trouble. While I don't believe in disturbance as a goal in itself, ideas and art run the risk of being upsetting. Of drawing fire.

The Categories of Disturbing Creativity

What provokes is something new that either:
*brings change in tow
*points out a previously unnoticed enticing alternative
*tampers with a revered tradition
*breaks a taboo
*exposes something we don't want to know about ourselves
*insults an icon
*hurts feelings
*diminishes or devalues something that others have greatly invested in.

Most of these can be positive or negative. And it's surprisingly hard to know in advance what the responses will be.

Also, it isn't easy to disturb the universe these days. There are already lots of disturbing things going on, and we are able know them almost instantly. Getting a bit of attention can be like pushing a barge up a hill.

Even so, a lot of us hesitate in our work, worrying about the outcome, or trying to control it.

If I were to revise Eliot here--cheeky, I know, and the universe is no doubt trembling-- I'd likely make the question: do I dare to steadily work, without knowing the outcomes?

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"...To Take Control of Your Life"

It's a rare book that changes my life in an instant. In fact I think there may be only one (not counting the ones I've written.)

Book 5 in my series of Rediscovered Treasures is Boundaries: When to Say YES, When to Say NO, To Take Control of Your Life.

What this book Boundaries does is view proper protection of your time, space, and self as a crucial moral practice. The authors, Henry Cloud(gotta love a website called drcloud.com) and John Townsend, lay out their argument based on biblical quotes. So the thinking is Christian. But you don't have to be Christian to see that they're right: being a pushover is squandering life. If I let myself be run over and diverted from what I know I'm supposed to be doing, I'm up to no good.

Conquering Fears of Saying No

When I read this, quite a few years ago, I was entirely convinced. Before that I'd had a niggling underground conflict that a really good person would be able to do her stuff and everyone else's too. That conflict was dead well before I got to the last page. I've never even had to review the book again. It worked. Like a magic bullet.

Powerful book. Have a look at it, especially if you're in the habit of letting yourself be blown off course.

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Surprise Book

This afternoon in the writing group I've attended weekly for 26 years, a writer read from a book that none of us knew she'd been writing. And it is terrific! It is splendid! And she has a huge amount of it done.

This event is roughly equivalent to discovering that your next-door neighbor of 20+ years has a ten year-old child at home who has never been mentioned. And a rather brilliant kid at that.

She was simply writing along on this never-really-meant-for-publication project. And now it blurps forth in full sharp glory. I may not have mentioned: it's an exceptionally bold book as well.

Telling oneself that a project is just for fun or private writing is an excellent disinhibitor and freer of creativity.

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Create an Easier Way

My psychologist husband tells me I like to create "Great Wall of China projects." And it's true that I seem drawn to doing things the hard way. For example, I made a quilt with a needle and thread.

But I'd rather not have to do everything the most difficult way, or the high-stress bear-down-hard way, especially finishing books. Which brings me to:

Book 4 in my personal series of Rediscovered Treasures

The book is Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...and it's all small stuff by Richard Carlson, a wise fellow indeed. My natural inclination is to sweat the big stuff and think it's all big stuff. So I like this book a lot, not that I've put a huge lot of it into practice.

Here's one title of this collection of tiny, pithy essays about taking it easier and having a good, productive life anyway.

"Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Superachievers"

Carlson makes several excellent points in this 4-paragraph gem.

*getting out of emergency mode does not mean giving up good results
*fear and frenzy get in the way of creativity
*feeling calm and peaceful makes for better concentration

Good, yes? I'm going to reread the whole book. Slowly. Peacefully.

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The Creative Courage List

After a couple of days away, back to my list of rediscovered treasures. Number Three (not in order of importance) is Julia Cameron's seminal, world-changing, now-classic The Artist's Way.

The book is inspiring and encouraging in ways all its own. And at the same time it delivers two ideas that are bold in both their simplicity and their effectiveness.

Morning Pages

Every morning on awakening dash off three pages in handwriting at top speed not for publication. The idea is to clear the pipes and get to the good stuff. It has worked well for me, when I've gotten myself to do it.

The Artist's Date

An artist's date is when we each go alone out into the world--at least once a week for two hours--on a refreshing excursion to see or do something new. This is to refill the pipes. This one works too. Though I don't have to be encouraged to go out exploring.

Personal update: I was back in my hometown of Wilmington, NC, for the last couple of days, visiting my mom and the ocean and by chance seeing 4 people from my high school class (1966!) who all happened to be eating Sunday lunch at the same place. The others were visiting from Virginia and Philadelphia. Such trips seem to stir an ever-deeper pot of memories and connections. It all added up to a sort of artist's date.

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One Simple Principle for Better and Easier Decision Making

Wonderful wisdom today from the Daily Om on making decisions:


"Before making your choice, release your fear of wrong decisions. Perceived mistakes can lead you down wonderful and unexpected paths that expose you to life-changing insights. If you can let go of the notion that certain choices are utterly right while others are entirely wrong, you will be less tempted to invite others to take the reigns of your destiny.

When your choices are your own, you will be more likely to accept and be satisfied with the outcome of those choices. Your decisions will be a pure reflection of your desires, your creativity, your awareness, and your power."


This reminds me of a book I read in my twenties. If I'd been able to fully put it into practice then, I'd likely have needed about 62% less psychotherapy. The book is The Psychology of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden. It essentially argues that self-respect comes from making your own choices based on your own highest values and accepting responsibility for the consequences. Not entirely easy. But a lot more attainable, satisfying, and worthwhile than trying to make decisions perceived as perfect, right, or normal in the "eyes of the world."

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How to Stay Creative

Women Who Run with the Wolves is Book 2 in my series of rediscovered treasures.

I remember well when it came out because I was then in the editing process of the book I co-authored, The Healing Power of Doing Good, and working with the same publisher. And so on the phone one day, I got to tell then-editor Joelle Delbourgo at Ballantine: I stayed up late last night reading the Clarissa Pinkola Estes book and was so excited by it I couldn't sleep. She was pretty excited about that book too.

The conversation somehow made me feel closer to the message of the book. Which is: Women! renew and guard and rely on your instinctive, intuitive capabilities. Use them to do what's important to you.

Estes writes about excitement, passion, courage and how to stay vividly alive and creative.

Number One Principle of Creativity: Keep Coming Back

"Protect your creative life," she says, "Practice your work every day. Then, let no thought, no man, no woman, no mate, no friend, no religion, no job, and no crabbed voice force you into a famine. If necessary, show your incisors."

Typing that quote made me ask myself: Do I have to show "incisors" to protect my work time? I did interrupt 2 social conversations so far today, each time saying: I have to get back to it.

But both chats were with writers, and knew what "it" meant. So no incisors were needed. Which has usually been my experience. Still, it's good to be able to trust one's guardian wolf as needed, to know that she's there.

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Saying No at All the Wrong Times

The Jonah Complex is what Abraham Maslow calls the business of turning down our most profound callings:

"The evasion of one's own growth,
the setting of low levels of aspiration,
the fear of doing what one is capable of doing,
voluntary self-crippling,
pseudo-stupidity,
mock humility."

Personal Confessions: My Own Whale Tale

Ten or so years into freelance writing--finally reasonably well-established-- I got an inconvenient urge toward the ministry. I resisted. (I still think I was right to do so)

Then a few years later came the more compelling need to write a story about a minister who hears the voice of God and would prefer not to. I said to myself: is this what I want to do? And then I said to myself: if I turn this one down, the next one is likely to be even worse: opera singing or some such. So I wrote my first novel Revelation.

No regrets. But I also know for sure that some callings keep coming back, one way or another. Might as well figure out the best way to say yes.

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