Monday, October 24, 2005

Underachieving Writer

I considered several alternate titles for this post, including "The Pressure to Produce." In my case, and in the case of most fiction writers, the pressure is largely internal. And fierce.

Last night I was reading Reynolds Price's latest novel THE GOOD PRIEST'S SON. I noted once again that Reynolds has published something on the order of 50 books. I wiped the exact figure from my mind.

I envy such productivity.

I hold no grudge against the success of others. In fact it's a pleasure that inevitably gives me hope. But output--that's a different matter.

Then too, out-in-the-world reception of my books is not directly in my control. Productivity is. Or so I nag at myself.

I try to tell myself that my currently unbudging slower pace is part of some divine natural order. Plants grow at different rates, and all that. The argument works some of the time.

If I felt I was giving writing books my 100% best effort every day, then I think I'd be satisfied. But who does that? Quite a few writers, I imagine. Not me. I procrastinate part of almost every day. I do get to the work. But what of those hours of desk-puttering? I wonder what my life and my work would look like if I focused all day. Maybe better, maybe worse. I don't know that I'll ever know.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is my theory and I'm sticking to it.

Moving to a new writing space, even when it's a wonderful, enthusiastic move, invites puttering. Not the focused "this is how I get to the zone stuff," either, but scattered, lackadaisical puttering.

I come up here every day, many times, and I'm revising, not writing first draft material, so how hard is that? Just take up some pages and begin reading. Nevertheless, I pause to check email, read blogs, look at the empty space in the room and ponder what should go there, if anything, which leads me directly to ebay to look for some particular item.

I feel like the work is a conveyor belt, one I used to be able to hop onto at pretty much any time and with very little hesitation. But now, the conveyor belt is going faster, there's new background to peruse, and I'm dancing around on the edges trying to find the exact right moment to jump on.

Do you think it's better to take a day off and stir things up with a change in routine, or plug away with some work each day to keep the momentum?

I'm doing a bit of both lately and not noticing much difference.

Anonymous said...

I like your combo idea, Billie: time off and at the same time "touching" the story. I think it needs to be touched every day (or 2 or 5 days a week, whatever your writing schedule is). Can't remember if it was Horace or Cicero who said: Never a day without a line. Of course that does not apply on vacations. I'm sure Horace or Cicero would agree.