Monday, January 28, 2008

Creative Courage and Car Repairs

My 17 year-old car--which you've seen on this blog before because I stencilled morning glories on it--is in the shop today for $700 worth of replacement of small wornout parts that were causing it to rumble and shimmy and throb and would soon make it stop altogether.

So I've been working at a grocery store cafe (Weaver Street Market)and a library computer (Carrboro Cybrary) all day while waiting for this to be fixed. Pleasant places to work, but the whole idea of sitting outside of the car ICU (Autologic) does not make me feel bold.

So I tell myself: it's not my body or one of my loved ones that's in the ICU, and I'm fortunate to have such a glorious and faithful car that is now getting a whole new lease on life, and it's not $2,000, and I haven't wasted the day.

But the fact is: I feel as if I somehow didn't play my cards right or I wouldn't have to buy $700 worth of car maintenance today.

This is irrational. We all have to get our cars and our teeth worked on. And nobody can slay dragons every day.

So, I've decided that for me today's dragon-in-need-of-being-slain (since I need one)is the idea that needing a car repair and wincing at the cost are not an indication of bad life decisions.

Devoting as much of my time and money as possible to art is not an indication of immaturity or failure.

On days like today, I do need to remind myself of that.



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6 comments:

Debra w said...

Oh Peggy,

It sounds as if your Morning Glory mobile has been quite faithful to you for seventeen long years, and now it just needs a little boost.

I know it's hard not to feel as if we could have done something different to change how things are, but like you said, sometimes we just have to go to the dentist. Not a lot of fun, I know, but maintenance, non-the-less.

Debra w said...

none the less...oops!

Peggy Payne said...

Morning Glory is now restored to humming condition. She deserves nothing less.

Debra w said...

Peggy,

All is right with the world!

trisha said...

Car repair as an indication of bad life decisions? On the contrary. Getting great service from your car for 17 years shows plenty of smarts. I love my 12 yr-old car, plan to drive her till she won't go no more. Every time I get behind the wheel I think about how cool I am by keeping her on the road.

As for devoting time and money to art: we humans need, require art like we need bread and rain and love.

Keep the faith...

Peggy Payne said...

"Bread and rain and love"-- I like that a lot.

Thanks, and best of health to your 12-year-old.