Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway?

Brain research from Israel shows that what works best for taking immediate brave action is to disconnect from the fear and do it anyway.

Neuron magazine reports that people watched in an MRI machine could let a live snake closer to their heads if they "dissociated" from the feeling of fear.

"Courage is associated with dissociation of reported fear and somatic arousal." Somatic arousal being the physical agitation: pounding heart, sweat, etc.

In my view, anyone who can let a snake get near them in an MRI machine is already Batman.

But I do find the research potentially very useful to me. Essentially, it is to put the feelings aside. We've all done that, putting an emotion aside in moments when "the show must go on." So everyone knows how. Probably courage is a matter of being conscious and practiced at "not feeling the fear" though we know it's there, rather than being fearless or panicked.

(I'm currently working on putting aside the feeling of being sweat-soaked from a half hour midday walk -- by blogging and carefully placed ice cubes.)








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Taking a Bold Approach with Tennis Elbow

I put my little kayak in the water yesterday and went for the first longish paddle of this year. Tennis elbow has kept me away from it for months.

I was waiting for it to be totally healed, then got tired of waiting, and went for a little kayak ride anyway.

I've used that strategy with an injury on two other occasions. Once it was a total permanent cure (for back trouble) and the other time it landed me in six months of physical therapy (for a frozen shoulder.)

This time, no change. I had a fine time on the lake and today my elbow hurts no worse than it was already accustomed to.

In fact, it hardly hurts at all.


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Do Something New -- Or Do an Old Thing Differently

I'd heard that the gallery light in the new N.C. Art Museum had a mysterious ethereal beauty.

Last night at dusk and in a thunderstorm, I made my first visit. (Characteristically, it was work that took me there: a gallery is going to be a setting for important stuff in my YA(young adult)-paranormal-romance-in-progress.)

I did find the ethereal light, the feeling that the classical sculptures had brought all of history with them.

And, my point, I was reminded of the refreshing value of regularly doing something new -- ideally every day.


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The Very Bold Harvey Milk

Last night, I watched the movie Milk, the biopic about San Francisco Supervisor Harvey Milk, the first openly gay man to hold major public office in this country.

Sean Penn did a terrific job playing the part (won a Best Actor Oscar.)

I already knew of course that Milk and the supportive mayor of the city were murdered in city hall by a fellow councilman.

What struck me in the movie was how many times Milk lost and ran again before he was elected. He was defeated in three campaigns before he won. That's a lot of times to go through the day-and-night siege of a campaign, a long time to keep up the kind of courage he had to have, approaching lecterns again and again in spite of death threats.

I certainly admired the man's politics and courage. I also now admire his persistence.

Here's a clip from the real Harvey Milk:




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I Write Like Margaret Atwood?

Should you be in the mood for a hilarious compliment to boost your boldness factor, go get your writing "analyzed" at I Write Like Margaret Atwood.

All you have to do is paste in a few paragraphs and the site's software speedily decides what well-known writer uses similar word choice and syntax.

I ran across it on a Facebook entry this morning and hurried straight to the site.

I learned that I am very versatile. I pasted in a few grafs from three of my novels.

In my first Revelation, about a Chapel Hill minister who hears the voice of God, "I Write Like H.P. Lovecraft." Wikipedia reminds me that this early 20th century writer of sci-fi, fantasy, and horror is known especially for "the subgenre known as weird fiction.

Lovecraft's guiding literary principle was what he termed 'cosmicism' or 'cosmic horror'..."

In my second, Sister India, "I Write Like Jonathan Swift." Jonathan Swift!! Remember Gulliver's Travels? How is it that I write like a turn of the 18th century British satirist, preacher, and pamphleteer? Probably because the narrating main character is an American woman who has taken to Indian English.

And I've happily learned that in my recently completed "Blue Serpent Rising," "I Write Like Vladimir Nabokov." This pleases me. I can live with this. In fact, I think it would make a nice blurb. My "Blue Serpent" and Lolita do have some interests in common.

Go give it a try and report back who you write like. One way or another, it's likely to give you an emboldening burst of energy.




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Self-Defeating Thoughts and Questions

So often it's difficult to know which is "the better part of valor."

I think most of us would do the right thing most of the time if we were sure what it was. (Heady discussion at lunch today about the pros and cons of fundamentalist religion: it does give a secure sense of right and wrong about many things.)

But would any religious code tell me whether to keep working at the moment or take a nap or the afternoon off and start again refreshed? Maybe it's too small a matter to matter. But such decisions often feel quite important to me. ( See obsessive compulsive disorder: scrupulosity)

Once I righteously kept working (which involved driving to a copy center) when I was very tired. I got hit by an 18-wheeler and my car was totaled. It was half my fault; I thought he was signalling to me to drive out in front of him, but he wasn't. Would have been better if I'd taken a nap. But how was I to know?

A person could waste a lot of time and energy and joy trying to make the right decision about everything.

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Rondori: Dealing with Several Problems at Once

How is it possible that my car failed, my computer got a virus, I lost my health insurance, my credit card was stolen, my psychologist husband moved into a new office and independent practice after 42 years with his old group, and major repairs are going on at our house--all in the same few weeks?

Is it something I said?

In some martial arts testing, there's a part called rondori or randori, when multiple attackers come at the candidate all at once. The goal is to stay upright as long as possible.

The closest I'm coming to bold just now is to keep dealing with things one by one.

I'm happy that it's mostly just technical difficulties. My thoughts are with regular visitor here, Mamie, who is coping with big rondori right now.


Steven Seagal performs rondori, aikido

///RHYS ISTERIX | MySpace Video


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My Fourth of July Car

A flower-mobile (see photo two posts ago) is a hard act to follow, of course. But my morning glory car was replaced -- on the eve of Independence Day weekend -- by this cherry-bomb-red 1998 Ford Escort. I'm thrilled and feeling a new surge of bold independence.

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Attempting Something New

Yesterday I sold my flowered '92 Camry on Craigs List.(see photo below) About twenty people were interested within minutes of my posting, three of them fiercely so. I felt as if I were suddenly defending a dissertation (not that I really know what that feels like.)

The experience was a bit agitating because I know nothing about cars, could answer none of the questions, and wondered if I'd set the price too low. Also, I'd done no Craig List commerce and didn't know what to expect.

By the time Husband Bob picked me up at my office to go home, I felt as if I'd successfully climbed one of the world's great mountains. The car was gone, and the cash was in my pocketbook. The fact that I'd also done some work on a novel was nothing compared to the feeling of satisfaction at having managed something I hadn't done before.

So I'm reminded once again: It's worth doing new things, large or small, if only for the adventure and sense of accomplishment -- both for making the effort and for any smidgen of success.



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Rare Piece of Literary Memorabilia For Sale!

I'm thinking of rehoming my beloved Morning Glory Car, in which I've had many literary thoughts and even written a few immortal pages.
For the right collector of literary stuff, particularly North Carolina or Southern, this hand-stencilled-by-the-author art car will be a real find. For the right offer, I'll throw in signed copies of my books.

Handsome by candlelight, she's a 1992 Camry with 234,000 miles who needs work done.

Make me an offer now. Just think: The Duke Library is collecting my papers. You can be the collector of my vehicle. Act now! There will never be another one of these.

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A Political Heroine

Cheers for Elaine Marshall, who just won a primary runoff in the face of huge obstacles. Her opponent was the candidate of the party establishment (according to the News & Observer) and she was dealt a tremendous personal blow with the death of her husband during the campaign (which I only learned after the results were in.)

She now has the Democratic nomination in the U.S. Senate race in my North Carolina neighborhood. I'd love to see what she does as senator. Check her out at Elaine Marshall for US Senate or "like" her on Facebook if you do that sort of thing.


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My Own Little Oil Crisis

Bold move for me: I put oil in my car, for the first time ever.

The oil light on the dash had started to flicker late last night. I picked up a few quarts at a convenience store. A helpful guy there advised on what kind a '92 Camry would most like. (This is a car I dearly love.)

This morning, with a funnel from the kitchen and a gardening tool to prop the hood up and my cell to call Auto Logic to get info on what hole to pour the stuff in, I accomplished this miracle.

To add to the adventure, the temp was over 90 degrees and the metal all too hot to directly touch.

None of the normal writing and editing work I did in the rest of the day produced anything like the sense of accomplishment I feel from this historic first. I like the feeling. Perhaps tomorrow I'll take up electrical work.



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The Courage to Age

Good friend with bad diagnosis. Too much of this is happening and at an increasing pace. And I'm only 61.

I'd always heard that old age was not for sissies; I thought that saying referred to coping with one's own ailments, impairments and indignities.

But, no -- it's a whole lot larger than that.

I've watched my wonderfully healthy mother deal with what has happened to so many people close to her. It started when she was 56 -- more than 30 years ago. One example: a few years back, she went on a three-week trip and came home to find that three friends had died.

My point: you gotta be bold to get old. The elderly don't get enough credit for their strength.


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Hypnosis at My House on Friday

This is a plug for the wonders of my magical husband. A clinical psychologist, Bob teaches self-hypnosis in an all-day seminar at our house about every three months. This quarter's "all-day," as we call it, is this Friday at our log cabin beside a pond in the woods.

Participants learn to use self-hypnosis for whatever purpose they choose: enhancing creativity, managing pain, improving focus, dealing with emotions, or who-knows-what else. I've been to a couple of these one-day classes myself; the day after the first one, I started Revelation, my first published novel.

If you're going to be anywhere near the Chapel Hill/Jordan Lake area of North Carolina and are interested, call Bob Dick at 919 215-4703 for info. It's a bold step toward your goal.


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The Key to Creativity

Handled horizontally, this is the new key to my office, freshly adorned with moon and stars.

Vertically and pointing up, it's now a key for opening my imagination.

Pointing down, it goes to my unconscious.

What a handy tool to have close by at all times! Maybe I'll be more careful now not to misplace my keys.





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Take One Small Action

It's easy to doubt the effectiveness of one more small action toward a goal. Here's a light-hearted reminder that setting one thing in motion can make a difference. Thanks to Michael Lindsay of Inform Creative Services for sending this cheerful burst of creativity.


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Stephen King and Colonel Sanders

Reminders to persist toward your bold goals:

"Colonel Sanders was in his 60s before he founded Kentucky Fried Chicken.
...Stephen King wrote many novels before he had his first one published.
Dolly Parton was told that she sang like a billy goat and had no chance of making it in show business."

Please note the source of this encouragement: SZ Magazine, a publication on dealing with schizophrenia, created and edited by Bill MacPhee, who was diagnosed with this ailment at the age of 24.

"Over the years of publishing SZ Magazine," he writes, "I've noticed one common denominator: The people who deal well with their illness have persistence. that seems to be the difference between people who succeed and people who do not. People who keep trying...succeed despite their failures."

This is also true of people who don't carry the burden of schizophrenia.


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Focus on the Goal

Spiders aren't a particular fear of mine, but I don't love them. This one, discovered at night our semi-outdoor sink, was different from anything I'd seen before, its body like a small avocado.

It was so unusual I decided to take a picture and wound up getting closer to it than I otherwise would have.

Which reminded me: fear diminishes when there's a job to focus on. I found in my early news reporting days that I felt pretty comfortable asking anyone anything if it was for a story I was working on. A task focus is a calming, emboldening strategy that can be used in a lot of situations.

Have you found this to be true in your life?


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Bold Color Combination

I think they're wonderful together. My husband thinks they're wonderful separate. What do you think?

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The Necessity of Feeling Bad Sometimes

"The dear old human experience is a singular, difficult, shadowed, brilliant experience that does not resolve into being comfortable in the world. The valley of the shadow is part of that, and you are depriving yourself if you do not experience what humankind has experienced, including doubt and sorrow. We experience pain and difficulty as failure instead of saying, I will pass through this, everyone I have ever admired has passed through this, music has come out of it, literature has come out of it. We should think of our humanity as a privilege."

--from the wondrously fine writer Marilynne Robinson, in an interview in The Paris Review, as reported in an essay by Meghan O'Rourke in a column for The Week.


And I thought I was the only one who feels I failed if I'm unhappy. Apparently, everybody and their sister feels the same way. The logic for this faulty conclusion is clear: if I'm not happy, then I've been unable to arrange things the way I want them. Which makes me feel like a schlump. But what mortal can arrange everything the way she wants?

I like Robinson's approach much better. It's a lot less arrogant. And it could be a huge relief -- if I ever entirely convince myself.



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Bold Soldiers

Wherever each of us is on the hawk to dove continuum, I think we have to admit that soldiers are bold. They act on their convictions and risk their lives in that action. They also risk coming home with brain damage and/or missing limbs.

So, here's to the bold soldiers of all stripes!

Happy Memorial Day to you and the warriors closest to your heart.


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Theoretically Bold

I'm going to visit my mom this weekend which means I'm also going to the beach (Wrightsville Beach, NC). I was right on the point of scheduling a surfing lesson, the first in my life, when I suddenly remembered that I have tennis elbow in my right arm.

Probably I should wait until I can use both arms.

Frustrating? Or off the hook? Or both?

I do mean to do this thing -- and this summer. I'm not waiting another year. But probably not this weekend.



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Hazel Soares Soars

Bold and persistent, 94 year-old Hazel Soares got her degree in art history from Mills College this past week.

Mills itself is pretty bold. From the website: "Over the decades, Mills “firsts” have been numerous: the first women's college west of the Rockies (chartered 1885); the first laboratory school west of the Mississippi for aspiring teachers (1926); the first women’s college to offer a computer science major (1974) and a 4+1 MBA degree (2001); the first business school in the West for women (2005); and the first MFA program in book art and creative writing in the nation (2009).

Always a leader in the arts, Mills was among the first liberal arts colleges to offer a modern dance degree (1941), and it became the national center for modern dance outside New York City. The Center for Contemporary Music, dedicated in 1967, is a preeminent center for electronic music."

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Do What You Can ...

...to save the world.


Taken at Swan Quarter, NC, near the ferry to Ocracoke

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What's Scary and What Isn't

Different things scare different folks. A bold move for one person is routine for another, and vice versa.

For example, if I tried to take the stand that this bird is so casually doing, I would be bold, indeed. On the other hand, I've done some things that this fellow would absolutely quail at.

My point, punnery aside, is that comparisons, in the case of courage, are not only odious, they simply don't work. Best to avoid comparing ourselves with others in any way.

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Hurrah for Helen!

Helen Mirren's wax likeness was unveiled at Mme. Tussaud's yesterday and the picture of her with the fake version was number one in gossip site Radaronline's Hot Photos.

I applaud the bold Dame Helen for the chutzpah to be totally hot at 65.


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Bold Teacher-Writers

Last week I taught my "Writing Powerful Stories" workshop on Ocracoke Island on the North Carolina Outer Banks.

The participants were public school teachers/guidance counselors/principals, etc. The sponsor was the NC Center for the Advancement of Teaching.

What's bold about this? For one, I, who am primarily a writer, was teaching teachers. And more striking, the courage and honesty of the teachers in writing their own powerful stories. They did good and brave work-- and weathered 30 instructional hours in just a few days.

We went on a couple of outings: one by boat to the long-abandoned town (with its restored one-room school) on nearby Portsmouth Island.

Here's some of the scenery: starting with the ferry taking me to my Ocracoke Island teaching assignment.










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A Week (Almost) on an Island

I'm getting ready to head off to Ocracoke on the NC Outer Banks to teach a writing class for five days for NCCAT. Very nice assignment, I know.

At the same time, teaching is the boldest thing I ever do. The most demanding of attentiveness. Writing is a piece of cake, by comparison. Public speaking is a walk in the park. (Pardon the cliches, please.) Teaching is serious stuff.

Ran across this comparison of writing and teaching from Parker J. Palmer, whom I've quoted here before:

"Writing is easy," someone once said. "You just sit down and open a vein." Teaching is an equally vulnerable act, performed, as it is, at the dangerous intersection of the public and the personal. To teach well, I must reveal things about which I care deeply-not the intimate details of my life, but subjects that I find crucial and compelling, that have helped shape who I am. The courage to teach is the courage to risk the judgment that comes when I expose my passions to public scrutiny."

So I'm getting my adrenaline cranked up--and packing my sunscreen. Will report back.

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Gandhi as Shy Guy

Gandhi, one of my often-mentioned heroes, is an encouraging example in part because of his rough start.

Prior to peacefully running the British out of India, he was a lawyer who was too cowed to speak up in court. He lost case after case. "He was a total failure," writes Paul Rogat Loeb in an AARP Bulletin piece adapted from his book Soul of a Citizen. Gandhi's Indian family "sent him off to South Africa, where he found his voice by challenging racial segregation."

It's a truism of public speaking that we lose any fear of it once what we have to say becomes more important than our personal performance.

"I love viewing Gandhi not as the master strategist of social change," Loeb writes, "but as someone who first was literally tongue-tied, shy and intimidated."

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Don't Forget to Look Up

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A Shocking Number

Just passed a thousand posts on Friday without even knowing it. That would be about three novels in length. Though, I must say my novels are more considered than my posts. Still, it does make me think. A thousand! Damn! Will have to cook up an appropriate celebration.

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Shear Boldness

Yesterday afternoon my writing group was called off, and instead of rushing back to my laptop, I went home and hit the garden.

Hit is the operative word. I did some serious pruning. For me, this is a bold move.

My general gardening philosophy is: if a thing wants to grow, I let it grow. This concept, put into practice, lends the place a certain straggly aura.

Yesterday, however, I got out the good clippers and restored all the edges, crisped up the paths. It looks great. The shrubs are looking perky and robust. And I'm very empowered.



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Yet Another Great Quote Sent in by Mamie

Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor Satan
shudders and says, "Oh no, she's awake."
- unknown

(Mamie can be found at Can I Do It?)

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Older and Bolder

I find growing older, I'm increasingly bolder
And increasingly hard to subdue!
- author unknown

Contributed by quote maven Mamie of Can I Do It?

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My Writerly News!

Got me a new agent and I'm really happy with her. This is always a great moment in a writer's life. So I'm celebrating. And Husband Bob brought home hydrangeas.

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Take a Step Toward Your Dream

"Talk does not cook rice."

-Chinese Proverb, quoted from productivity guru David Allen's latest newsletter. (His mantra is Getting Things Done or GTD.)

I'm a great fan of talk myself. However, in most situations, the conversation (or the monologue) has to be followed by action for any "rice" to result.

Rice, I now realize, is a symbol of fertility and prosperity.

What have you been talking about lately that you haven't put on the burner? Set some rice to simmering now.

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"Brave Voices for the Ill"

My sister-in-law Ruth Sheehan, a truly bold writer, is a columnist for the local News & Observer. She has often used that space to champion better treatment for the mentally ill.

Recently she started a column saying: "It took a lot of guts to write this book." Which would have gotten my attention even if she weren't related to me.

The book Our Voices: First Person Accounts of Schizophrenia is written by five people who are in treatment. The idea is to get rid of some of the stigma of the illness by busting myths and showing what the experience is and the competence of some who have it. The five decided to use their real names. That was the second gutsy move after writing it.

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Bold in the Morning

Made a recent personal discovery: I have more courage in the morning. I don't mean the arduous moments of struggling to wake up, but instead after I get rolling. Then the world feels new, or newish, and I'm out in it.

Fatigue, on the other hand, does not make me bold. And that's probably just as well.

Have you observed any such patterns in yourself? This could be useful info for scheduling.

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Bold Basketball

Last night's national college men's (NCAA) championship was a contest in which neither side backed down or got rattled or gave less than a terrific performance.

An underdog team went up against a school that has won the title several times, but not in quite a few years.

An aging super-star coach competed against a young rising star coach.

Duke versus Butler reached mythic proportions.

Duke won, (my alma mater, as it happens) but only by a two-point basket and the game was still undecided in the last 13 seconds. And all involved played their parts with gumption (which is to say, a combo of dignity and fire.)

It was exciting and lovely to see, if you like basketball, as most people in my home state of North Carolina do.

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The New Year

It's Passover. It's Easter. It's spring.

I wish you refreshing newness of life and the strength of your roots and traditions.

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Bloom Where You Land

This little rock garden plant emerged between the front steps of my office building and has been blooming cheerily for about a week. Everyone is careful to step over it.

This is a good demonstration of the crack/flaw in an object being part of its charm. Remember the story of the cracked pot and "do your thing" whether you're perfect or not.

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Do What You Love

Dropping by my local library a week ago, I looked around toward the desk to say "hi" to my favorite librarian. I didn't see her and figured it wasn't her Sunday to work.

A few more steps and I came upon a picture of her, surrounded by fresh camellias from someone's yard. Joyce. That's the only name I knew her by. She'd died two days earlier, suddenly of a stroke at the age of 58.

Since then I've learned that she -- Joyce Bingham -- was a lot of people's favorite librarian. Many people looked around to say hello when they came in the door. Now there are notes around her picture acknowledging that: "...I never even knew your name..."

The obit in the News & Observer said she had lived a "vagabond life" settling finally here in Apex, North Carolina. Her philosophy: "Do what you love, Love what you do! Bloom where you are planted!" She certainly bloomed at the Eva Perry library.

Notice of the memorial service requested: "To reflect Joyce's spreading of sunshine to all who knew her, the family requests no black attire."

Do what you love, Love what you do. And don't delay getting around to it.

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Gutsy Obama

However you feel about the healthcare reform bill passed this week(and I'm heartily in favor), it's surely clear that Obama is a president who has stuck his neck out. Who bet the farm. Who put his eggs in one basket. And any of the other cliches that stand for high-risk persistence over a long haul in the face of stubborn obstacles.

And he succeeded.

Obama was my candidate. And, though I don't agree with everything he has done (the war business), I'm immensely proud of him. Especially for the courageous and pragmatic way he has pursued this legislation.

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Plastic Highways

Just ran across this item about repairing roads with garbage in Saathee, which is a magazine for Indians living in the Carolinas.

It doesn't sound as if the idea is entirely worked out. However, this is the kind of thinking we all need to be doing: using one problem as the solution to another problem, thus solving both. That's bold.

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Attention: Raleigh Writers and Other Creative Types

One of the five offices in the charming 1910 Raleigh house where I work has been transformed. The room or half the room can be rented by the week or the month, by a writer or anyone else needing a place to work quietly within a small creative community. Above you see Desk One in the room now referred to as A Room of One's Own, with a nod toward Virginia Woolf. Below are Desk Two and the central conference area, all beautifully appointed and awaiting the grace of your presence.





Currently the downstairs of the house is occupied by owner Carrie Knowles, writer and visual artist and US director of the Cross Currents Chamber Music Arts Festival. She has an office, a studio, and, in the large foyer, a gallery. Then there's me, my office for writing, reading manuscripts, and meeting with writer clients.

Upstairs, Lisa Finaldi, national campaigns director for Greenpeace, has her headquarters. Greenpeace is the environmental outfit best known for defending whales against whaling ships on the high seas.

Right now, a memoirist and novelist is at work in A Room of One's Own, but space will be coming available again.

In addition to the inspiring and interesting company in this edge-of-downtown Raleigh building, there's a kitchen with a microwave and fridge, a small lovely garden and deck in the back, a big front porch, a bathroom with a clawfoot tub, a security system, and safe street parking.

You can rent a desk for $50 a week, and keep quiet so the renter of the other desk stays happy. Or you can rent the whole room for $100 a week and talk on your cell to your heart's content. Or you and a friend or colleague can share the office. Utilities are included in the price.

It's a good place to get a lot done: finish your novel, meet a tough deadline, get your dissertation wrapped up, start a consulting business.

Here are a few more visuals of life here. And if you're interested in more info or taking a look, contact Carrie Knowles at: cjknowles@earthlink.net.

The July crepe myrtles at the curb out front:

Carrie setting up a show in the gallery:


Our creed, posted in the foyer. And that's my office at the end of the hall:

Again, for more info, contact Carrie Knowles at: cjknowles@earthlink.net.

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Making Good on Old Promises

A couple of times, in answer to requests, I've promised pictures that I didn't immediately deliver.

I guess I should say I'm making semi-good on the promises, since I've come up with only picture in each category.

This first one is a piece of the road from where I live toward the first stretch of pavement. It's the downhill-and-around-a-pond route I said I didn't care to drive when the ruts had turned to ice: see, "The Driving Decision."


This second is from Rancho La Puerta spa in Tecate, Mexico, where I taught a writing class over Thanksgiving week (that's how long I've dragged in getting to this.) This is a walkway through the grape arbor toward one of the gyms. Rancho often shows that things don't have to look the way they usually do. The gym has stained glass doors and a fireplace with a piece of mosaic art inlaid in the stone wall above it. See: "Spa Teaching."




To me there's always something bold and adventurous about a path or a road.

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A Blogging Drought?

I seem to have fallen off quite a lot in my frequency of posting. Partly because I'm so busy. And also I haven't had sufficient impulse. It's easy to get out of the habit.

Not sure whether to let the rate sag until I feel like boldly opining more. Or to keep myself cranked up and pontificating daily as has so long been my custom.

I could flip a coin daily, and then whichever came up, I'd (characteristically) do the opposite.

Maybe, boldly, I won't ponder too hard about this. Over-pondering seems to be a favorite sport of the non-bold.

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A Short Week with a Long To-Do List

Almost finished cramming five days of work into four. Such are the perils of taking time off. Seems that I don't plan and schedule in a very self-protective way.

I've never thought of planning as a bold activity. Quite the reverse. But I'm starting to see that it could be. It would involve my taking a much more clear-eyed look at what I do and when and for how much. And how much time I spend taking a break and cruising Gawker.com and similar venues. Clear-eyed can lead to all kinds of worrisome questions.

(This is so short it could be a Facebook update. Apparently my style has been affected by the social media.)

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"You Rock"

Here's a most inspiring post from uber-blogger Seth Godin. It's similar to the change-by-making-a-series-of-tiny-changes approach of kaizen posted about here earlier.

Godin's idea is to be amazingly bold and excellent for a mere five minutes a day. To do that much can rock the world.

I agree with him on all except his last line. See what you think and let us know.

Note: I've been absent from posting for a couple of weeks. Now getting back in the saddle. I took a week of stay-cation: time off at home reading and puttering. Also took a wonderful drawing class. And of course I worked like a maniac in advance and immediately after in order to have time to do this. Thus the alarming absence of my posts... Thanks for noticing.


Note 2: I just noticed that I posted about kaizen this past January and three years ago and thought the concept was new to me both times. Well, I suppose that gives me double the pleasure of discovery.

Finally, welcome to Calin as a regular subscriber here.

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Public Speaking!

Y'all, I have always loved giving talks.

What I mean by a talk is standing up and telling 30 minutes of war stories, plus reading a few pages from one of my novels and then taking questions.

What's not to love about doing that?

This morning, however, I went to a session at a Duke alum seminar weekend ("Money, Sex, and Power") on giving more powerful presentations. I was one of the four who volunteered to give a talk and then get a critique in front of the sixty others in the group.

Oh, shit, I was terrible!

(I'm going to recover from this. I really, really am. I've just left that auditorium and come straight here to the library to blog about this experience.)

It was bold! I'll give myself that much credit. The three who went before me performed quite creditably.

The assignment was not to offer amiable personal anecdotes, but instead to make a three-minute presentation with a beginning, middle, and an end. I've done that only once since high school and I had a teleprompter then.

I won't bore you with details of how my effort this morning was a mess. Except to say that temperamentally, I'm a novelist. I communicate in units of 100,000 words, with lengthy flashbacks. Just believe me... (And it got worse as I realized how badly it was going. Perhaps from people's expressions of faint puzzlement and alarm.)

Now, here's the good news. I learned a lot. The teacher -- Joy Javits -- was terrific. She managed to say some nice things that I actually believed. I wound up feeling comfortable and redoing some parts in front of the group, using Joy's suggestions.

And I left with one tip that I know will stick with me: don't just skim my eyes across the whole audience, instead make lingering eye contact with one person after another.

Now, here's the clinker. I have a mid-day talk scheduled for Monday, at Edenton Street Methodist Church in Raleigh. My plan has been my usual rather informal chat. That's likely what I'll do, as usual. It goes over well. (In 39 years of giving little chats, it has gone over horribly only once --at Calvin College in Grand Rapids, Michigan--and semi-badly only twice, both in my hometown at UNCW where my father was a trustee. Thirty-nine years! Hear that, Joy? )

However, I may well pursue with Joy this business of learning to give a short pitch that's to the point. I need this skill so that I'll be prepared should I ever get an Oscar.

And now that I've told you all this, I feel much better. Really rather good, in fact. I couldn't immediately get my soothing and encouraging psychologist husband Bob on the phone to debrief, and turned next to you.

I'll let you know how the Monday talk goes.

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